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Author Topic: Gremlins  (Read 2955 times)

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Andromeda

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #30 on: August 12, 2005, 02:27:25 pm »
Here it is, Part 1b of Gremlins

Longer, more exciting, able to leap tall buidings in a single bound.  After reading the reviews of If Wishes Were Horses, I moved two paragraphs from the next part into this part.  See!  I learned something from just reading the forum here.

Part 1b
[/size]

Time dragged out slowly as the Watson moved into position.  Jessie had to force herself not to drum her fingers on her armrest.  She tried taking a deep calming breath but found it painful.  She forced herself to breathe slowly in and out until she could take that deep breath.  “Captain, is there something I can assist you with?” asked Lieutenant Cole. 

He had no doubt seen her wince.  To admit to a problem now meant missing the biggest mission of her life.  “Thank you XO, I don’t require anything,” she said formally.  He gave her a lingering look before returning to his duties.

Finally, they received the signal that Watson was ready.  “Raise our ECM to level two,” Jessie ordered, “and maintain as high a speed as possible.  Remember this is an information gathering pass.  Can we overload a photon torpedo and hold it while still beating the best speed they’ve demonstrated?”

“Aye Captain,” replied ensign Etheridge from his weapons console, “but it will drain the batteries fairly quickly and we won’t be able to recharge it.”

 “Helm,” she said, “once tactics is ready, take us in.  Six clicks distance from the Cousteau, four once we’re out of her torpedo arc.  Move and mark.”   She listened for the collection of acknowledgements before nodding to herself and the Holmes was underway. 

The Cousteau was still in orbit around the second planet, but turned to face them as Holmes came out from the shadow of the third.  “Cousteau has launched a drone,” ensign Etheridge said.  “It’s standard type one.  We will be able to evade it without using our own racks.” 

“Destroy it,” Jessie overrode him.  She didn’t want their preplanned course altered if possible.  When the missile reached effective range, a smaller drone was released from the Holmes and intercepted it, destroying both weapons.  The two ships closed and the Cousteau engaged its electronic systems, neutralizing the protection Holmes systems provided.  “Begin erratic maneuvers,” Jessie ordered. 

Just in time, as all four of the main phaser banks of the Cousteau opened fire.  The smaller ship rocked slightly, but this time everyone was prepared.  The shields held and the Holmes made its close pass of the saucer.  “I’ll need us to stop using EM, to get good data,” said Carawan.  The Holmes steadied its course and he leaned into his scanner.  “Photon tubes are cold, point defense phasers are hot, scout sensors are not active,” he said without looking up.  As they passed along the larger ship, he announced, “biological data coming in.  Approximately 300 life signs aboard.  None human.”

Jessie didn’t have time to wonder what had happened to the crew.  The cruiser began turning to pursue them.  “Signal Watson.  Tell them we have engaged the Cousteau.” 

Lieutenant Cole informed her when the signal was transmitted.  “Bring us around, keep our flank shields towards the Cousteau.  I want to bring down one of her forward shields.” 

The Holmes was able to make the turn inside the larger cruiser and had its weapons centerlined on the Cousteau before the cruiser was ready to fire.  “Batteries exhausted,” reported engineering, “we’re going to have to reduce speed.”

“Negative,” Jessie responded and interjected “Fire!” into her response.  “Keep the speed high and recharge what we can.”  Their own phasers lanced forward, accompanied by the heavier ‘thrum’ of the photon torpedo being launched.   

“Direct hit!”  Ensign Etheridge announced.  “Cousteau has reinforced the shield and is kicking in their batteries.  It’s holding.”

“Fire defensive phasers,” Jessie added.

“That did it!” he said excitedly, “their number two shield has collapsed.  No damage to the ship itself.”

“Well done,” Jessie complemented him.  “Chief Lick,” she said into her intercom.  “We have downed a shield on the Cousteau and will be making another pass.  “Transporter control is yours.  Get a team in, find out what they are, and get out.”   He replied with a tersely grunted “Aye.” 

Then the Cousteau returned fire.  Only half of the main phasers were able to bear on the Holmes, but she added her defensive phasers also.  Jessie could tell immediately that the Holmes had been hurt.  “Damage amidships,” reported the XO.  “Auxiliary control is offline.  Casualty reports: minor injuries only.”  She sighed in relief, feeling a sharp ache in her chest in response.

“Prepare a high energy turn.  We don’t want that shield being hit again when we make our next run,” she ordered.  “Just enough power in weapons to bring down any reinforcement they might use.  Use the rest in movement and defense.”

Despite the hurt done to their ship, and their newfound respect for the firepower of the cruiser, her orders were carried out quickly.  It was made worse on their next approach when crewman Carawan announced “energy signature in one of their photon tubes.  It's arming.  It looks like overload strength.”  There was a moment of silence on the bridge.  A single torpedo from the cruiser would be enough to knock down one of their shields on its own.

Holmes raced in, fired its phasers, this time doing unavoidable damage to the cruiser.  “It’s a good hit, Captain.” Etheridge reported.  “Damage scattered across their systems: “drone launcher, main bridge, defensive phaser, several hull hits, impulse engines, and a photon torpedo tube,” he added excitedly.

“Not the one that’s arming,” Carawan announced somberly. 

“Marines away,” Lieutenant Cole said.  “Cousteau is in firing position.”

“High-energy turn, now!”  Jessie exclaimed.  “Get us out of here.”  The ship shuddered as the Cousteau fired, but felt ok. 

“Aft shield collapsed,” Etheridge reported.  “No internal damage.”

The Holmes lurched again, this time from the turn Jessie had ordered, and made its way back alongside the cruiser.  As they passed it, the transporters collected the boarding party from the Cousteau.  “Stay outside of overload range for that torpedo,” she said, “and try to keep us off their centerline.  Maximum defense and do what you can for our shields.”

“Chief Lick reports they have captured an alien from the Cousteau,” Lieutenant Coles informed her.  “He also reports they’ve brought back a dead one for Dr. Law to take apart.”  There was some snickering.  “Belay that kind of talk on the bridge,” Jessie said quickly.

In the chagrinned silence that followed, Ensign Acton reported from the helm “Cousteau is not pursuing.  They’re turning back toward the planet.”

“They received some kind of signal from the planet,” Lieutenant Coles explained.  “Watson has apparently been discovered.”

“Pursuit course,” Jessie ordered quickly.  “Do what we can to slow them down.  Alert Watson that the Cousteau has an overloaded photon torpedo armed.”

Despite sniping from the corvette, the Cousteau returned to the planet and began pursuing the Watson.  Once the police ship was beyond the orbit of the third planet, the Cousteau turned back toward the second planet.  Holmes quickly evaded the cruiser and sped after its cohort.

Safely away from the Cousteau’s weapons, and with the adrenalin kick wearing off, Jessie realized how much worse she feeling.  She concentrated and registered her XO saying, “I hope the Watson learned something because right now the only think I can think of is blasting her until the computer ejects the saucer to prevent its destruction and towing that back to a starbase.”

Another idea was already forming itself in her mind.  She opened her mouth to speak and coughed instead.  She raised her hand to cover her mouth and it came down red.  She stared at it blankly, barely hearing Lieutenant Coles shouting, “Medical emergency on the bridge.”

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Scottish Andy

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #31 on: August 12, 2005, 07:43:01 pm »
Good installment, Andromeda. A decent length (and I'd now know, lol...) and a nice, brief SFB combat section. I'm interested to see what the aliens are, what their relation is to the planet, and how they took the GSC.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #32 on: August 18, 2005, 06:19:53 am »
Yes Rommie, give us some more!

Like Andy said, a good installment with a meticulous plan of battle. I certainly appreciate someone who gives us battles scripted within the boundaries of each ship's capabilities, as the whole "we fired and hit them, then they fired back and missed" style of storytelling doesn't tell us awhole lot. The essentials, sure, but not what a ship is really capable of, if she's straining to do it or not.
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kadh2000

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #33 on: August 18, 2005, 01:33:38 pm »
Yeah, I particularly like the batteries being used up comment.  Who ever writes that?

Not a bad cliffhanger from you either.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #34 on: August 19, 2005, 01:30:03 am »
Well that's something alright. Nice cliffhangers
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Andromeda

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #35 on: August 26, 2005, 04:30:40 am »
Part 3, in it's entirety.  No 3a, b, or bloody c.  There's a denoument to follow, but this concludes the main story.  I think it is pretty long.

 
Part III
[/size]

Rob Cole waited until the turbolift doors closed behind the medical team that was carrying Lieutenant Decker to sickbay before he sat in her chair.  Three years older than his captain and past the point where he could expect his own command, he couldn’t help but think that his golden opportunity had come.  He wished that he could come up with a better plan, one that would make headquarters take notice.

He then faced the chore of informing Watson.  Lieutenant Blake looked surprised to see Rob in the command chair.  “Captain Decker was injured and is in sickbay.”

“I see,” the captain of the Watson replied thoughtfully.  “Will she be okay?”

Rob shook his head.  “We don’t know yet.  I’m not a doctor so I hate to speculate, but I’m going to be in command of Holmes for the rest of the mission.”

Blake nodded again and smoothed his dark hair.  “Given the situation, I’m assuming command of the mission.”

He should have expected it, but the announcement came as a shock to Cole.  He could see no legitimate way to deny Lieutenant Blake’s pronouncement.  “The mission command is yours, sir,” he said.  “We were successful in our efforts to capture a live alien.  It’s in the brig and the commander of our marine contingent is interrogating it now.”

“I’ve received your data already on the battle with the Cousteau,” Blake said.  “Have you any recommendations for our next step.”

Cole frowned.  “Unless the interrogation reveals anything, the best I can come up with is to attack the Cousteau with everything we have until the ship’s computer separates the saucer section to prevent it from being destroyed.  Then we tow it back to starbase.”

“Noted,” Blake answered.  “Report as soon as you have any information.”  The communication ended abruptly and Rob wondered if the Watson’s captain had felt as left out of the loop earlier as he did now.

Testily he punched his comm. button and hailed the brig.  “Chief Lick, report on the status of the alien’s interrogation and I hope it’s good news.”  

“I’ve been trying to contact you for a few minutes,” the Chief replied.  He sounded upset.  “The prisoner is dead.”

“What’d you kill it for?”  Cole shot back.

“We didn’t,” Chief Lick answered evenly.  “It just keeled over a few minutes ago.  Without the doc taking a look at it, we won’t know why.”

“The captain’s in sickbay so it’s going to be some time before she gets around to your alien.  You’re on your own.  Perhaps have your corpsman cut open the other one.”

The Chief’s expression went from anger to concern in an instant.  “Is she alright?”

“When I know something, you’ll know something,” Cole said and cut him off.  

As much as he didn’t like it, he had the news passed on to the Watson.  It wasn’t long after that when Lieutenant Blake contacted him again.  “We’ve reviewed your information.  Before we try anything as drastic as your recommendation, we’re going to attempt to seize control of the Cousteau by boarding her.  How soon can you be ready to head back into battle?”

“We’ll be ready in a few minutes.  I’ll take the time to tell my marine contingent.  Are you certain we have the transporter capability?”

“Between our two ships we can do it,” Blake replied confidently.  “It’ll be just like taking a freighter back from the Orions.”

“Aye sir,” Coles responded.  He had voiced his concern and been overridden.  There was nothing else he could do.  

Rob left the bridge to Ensign Williams, and headed down to talk to Chief Lick.  He felt this was a job he needed to do in person.  As he expected, the Chief did not take it well.  “I’ve been on that ship, Lieutenant.  We’re not going to have time to set up a secure beaming point before they’ll be all over us.  Get me on the comm.   I need to talk to that guy and explain it to him.”

“That’s outside of the chain of command,” Rob responded glumly.  “You have your orders.”

The Chief nodded and a frown creased his face.  It was almost instantly replaced by a grin.  “At least allow me to talk to my opposite number on Watson so we can coordinate our actions.  Surely I can do that.”

Rob answered the Chief’s grin with one of his own.  “That I can let you do.  I’ll let you get back to work.”

He thought about taking a few minutes to go and look at the enemy and decided it was worth it.  The body remained in a cell in the brig.  It didn’t look like a particularly frightening creature.  If it hadn’t been a hostile being, Rob might have considered it a candidate for being a pet.  It was little more than half his height and covered in brown fur with white and black patches.  For all that its face was surprisingly human.  It reminded him more of a dog than anything else, though.  “Doesn’t look like much,” he commented to the marine on duty in the brig.

“No sir,” the man answered.  “There are just a lot of them and the ones we met were all carrying phasers.”

“Ah,” Rob said.  “I don’t suppose we even know what they call themselves.  Did it say anything before it died?”

The man shook his head.  “We call ‘em gremlins sir, since they’re infesting the Starfleet ship.”  Rob smiled at him, patted the marine on the shoulder, recalled his name; “Carry on trooper Marsden,” he said, and headed back to the bridge.  

He was halfway back when he was paged by the bridge.  “Doctor Law has a report on the captain, sir.”  Rob looked down the corridor.  He was near sickbay already so he altered his course to pay a visit.  

The outer office was empty so Rob passed into the infirmary.  Three of the beds were occupied, but the one the physician was beside garnered his attention.  It was rare to see anything attached to a patient: the beds took care of just about anything, but Captain Decker was wearing a breathing mask.   She looked very pale and fragile suddenly.  “Doc,” he asked, “is she going to be alright?”

Jan Law turned at the sound of his voice.  The mousy woman was holding a medical tricorder in her hands.  “Don’t be alarmed,” she said, addressing the worry in his voice but looking down at the device.  “She’ll recover.  If she’d come to me as soon as it happened, we would have just fixed her rib and she could have gone back on duty in a few minutes.  As it is, it finally punctured her lung and the lung collapsed.  Oh, I’m sorry.”  She looked up.  “She’ll be fine.  Right now I’m keeping her sedated and on artificial respiration.  You can have her back after a few days of rest.”

Rob nodded from a distance.  The doctor intimidated him.  The woman did her best to be personable but always seemed to be more interested in her instruments than in other people.  “I’m sure the crew will be happy to hear that.”

“Oh, yes,” she replied.  “I imagine they will.”  An insistent beep from a nearby comm. panel and a message from the bridge sent Rob hurrying on his way.  Watson was ready.  
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Andromeda

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #36 on: August 26, 2005, 04:32:34 am »
[okay, it was long.  Too long for the post size limit.]

***
[/size]
He ordered the ship into battle, following Lieutenant Blake’s plan and then contacted the marine’s commander again.  “You tell the doc to be ready,” the Chief said, “because it’s going to be bloody.”  He gave Rob a death’s head grin.  “We’ll give ‘em hell sir.”

“I’m sure you will.  Transporter control is now at your discretion.  Good luck.”

As before, Jake Carawan was quick to give a running status report on the Cousteau.  “Shields repaired since the last combat.  Other damaged systems,” he added with some surprise, “are still disabled.”  Rob considered that a good thing.  The cruiser with two working photons would be a nightmare.  He wondered if the ‘gremlins’ weren’t able to manage repairs.  It had been more than enough time, he though, to repair at least the torpedo tube.

One tube was bad enough, he quickly decided, as he watched it blow through the forward shield of the Watson as they approached.  The police ship launched a shuttle which released a scatterpack of drones.  Defensive phasers from the Cousteau knocked out two of the six drones and the other four downed two of its shields in return. 

Holmes took the lead position from Watson and closed on the cruiser.  The larger ship fired its heavy phasers at the police cutter and destroyed its forward shields as well.  Some energy penetrated into the ship. Rob held his breath when he saw the location until the damage report said sickbay was unharmed.  The collective release of air made him realize he wasn’t the only one.

With all three ships having shields down, there was no need for special maneuvering to get them in position to board the Cousteau.  The biggest challenge was in keeping the smaller maneuverable police ships behind the cruiser so it couldn’t use its heavy weapons.  In return they couldn’t fire on the Cousteau without risking injuring their own marines. 

Crewman Ingolia at the communications station turned on the box intercom so the bridge crew could hear what was going on.  The first sound was Chief Lick’s voice, saying “Team one away, team two into the transporter.” After that, it became confusing. 

“DZ clear – we’ve got company – six at the hatch.”  The sound of phaser fire punctuated the speech and the voices lost their distinctiveness.  “They’re trying to flank us – Cobb, Loewe, cover position one – team two in.”  Rob was sure enough of the voices at this point that he thought marines from Watson were in with his own troops.  “Ahh – they got Jody – break out the pr4 – clear the zone – can’t sir – Sam, Sam, Sam! - there’s too many of them.”  The phaser fire was a steady hum now and there were indistinct yells and screams.  If the gremlins were making sounds, Rob couldn’t distinguish them from those of the marines.  Then there was the reassuring hum of the heavier phaser cannon.  The feeling didn’t last long.  “They’ve got one too – cover! – hit the deck – break out the other one.”  There was more screaming and then a panicky voice shrieked for an emergency beam out.  After that, the fighting didn’t last long and the voices on the speaker were more controlled as the marines returned to the ship. 

Rob looked around the bridge to the ashen faces.  “Speaker off,” he ordered.  “Contact Watson, recommend we withdraw.” 

Chief Lick’s second in command contacted the bridge.  “It was no good sir.  There were too many of them to establish a safe beam in point.  We were never able to get an edge.”

“Where’s the Chief?” Rob asked.  He didn’t want to lose both his captain and the chief on the same mission.  His chance for promotion looked like it was rapidly disappearing.  He banished the unwanted thought angrily.

“Sickbay, sir.  He took one in the leg.  He’ll survive, sir.  He’s one tough bastard.” 

Rob had to switch his attention to the other conversation as Lieutenant Blake appeared on his viewscreen.  “Lieutenant Cole, we’re going to back off for a moment – long enough for you to prepare your shuttle as a scatterpack and us to retrieve ours if we can.  Then we’ll try your idea and prepare for a long sublight trip.”  Blake’s expression was grim.

The Cousteau pursued the two police ships for only a short distance as they were able to quickly distance themselves from it.  Rob took it as a sign that the gremlins were learning the limits of their ship’s acceleration and maneuverability. It would make future combat more dangerous.  He fervently hoped that it didn’t mean they were also figuring out how to balance the warp engine output.

Lieutenant Blake asked for a report on the scatterpack preparation.  Rob looked over at Ensign Etheridge.  “Thirty seconds, sir,” he echoed the weapons officer’s statement. 

“Very good,” Blake replied.  “We turn back in sixty seconds.  We go in together: we want it to move into the scatterpack.”

Rob acknowledged his orders.  He really wanted to confer with Holmes’s two senior officers.  Both were in sickbay though and he didn’t have enough time to make it there and back again.  With a sigh and a frown, he tried to figure out how to beat the Cousteau down without having his own ship blown up in return.  Two shields on his ship were already down and one was weak.  They had already taken internal damage.  Watson was in slightly better shape, but the older cutter wouldn’t take as much as Holmes before being disabled.  They had gotten lucky against the cruiser so far, but each hit against his small ship was going to be far more critical than each shot the cruiser took.  What the marines had taken earlier, he expected to take now. Rob hoped the end result would be better.

Chief Lick stared at the stump of his leg and the fancy medical gadget that started just above the knee.  He looked up and around him at his boys lying on beds in sickbay.  His worst fears had been justified and when some fool from the other ship had panicked a tough situation had nearly turned into a disaster.  He resolved to find a way to get some Romulan ale to his own ship’s transporter techs.  They had gotten everyone out, even the dead.

He felt the ship’s engines respond as they accelerated away from the Cousteau.  What could they do now other than get in a bloody firefight for which he held little hope?  A few quick passes, he could expect success from but the superior durability of a Starfleet cruiser was going to tell in a long battle.  His eyes fell on one of the few beds that didn’t hold a marine.  “Doc,” he called.  “I need you to wake up the Captain.”

Jan Law looked down at her tricorder; a reaction Lick knew meant she wasn’t sure of what she should do.  He also knew enough not to say any more.  If the doctor felt it was safe to do so, she would wake the captain.  Otherwise no matter how many times he asked, in whatever terms, he would not sway her.  She was a good sawbones.  “Alright,” she finally said, “but she’s not leaving that bed.”

“Even to save the ship?”  Lick said, trying not to sound like he was being serious.  It didn’t work.

“If it will save the ship,” the doctor said, deadpan, “she can leave but I will have to accompany her.”  Doctor Law removed the oxygen mask and pressed a hypospray to the Captain’s neck.  It did not take long to work.

Chief Lick watched as Lieutenant Decker’s breathing became more rapid and her eyes opened.  He let the doctor handle the captain’s initial reaction.  Then he got her attention.  “We’re in a tough spot, ma’am,” he said.  “Blake on the Watson’s in command.  We tried to board Cousteau and got beat off.  Now they’re gonna try and get the computer to eject the saucer automatically due to massive damage.  I don’t know what we…”

He had to stop as she interrupted him.  “Is the captive still alive?”

“How did you know?” he asked, astonished.

“Get me to the bridge,” she said tersely. The combat alert sounded.

Holmes was leading this time, her scatterpack already deployed and drones launched, and the two ships were nearing photon torpedo range for the Cousteau.  Rob Cole sat uncomfortably in the center chair and prayed the first shot would miss.  He gave it no thought when the turbolift door opened. 

“Mr. Coles, I’d like my chair back,” Jessie Decker said. 

He could have cheered, Rob was so relieved.  It wasn’t until he stood up that he noticed Doctor Law standing beside the Captain.  Decker was probably trying to be a hero and had somehow conned the doctor into certifying her fit for duty.  He hesitated then decided to let her have it.  “The bridge is yours, Captain.  Welcome back.”

“Thank you,” she replied and quickly, but gingerly sat down.  “Let the drones overtake us,” she said, quickly sizing up the situation.  “Give us as much ECM as you can.  Then turn and run toward the third planet.  Make sure Cousteau pursues.”

Rob Cole could almost feel the anger behind the sudden beeping of the comm. channel from the Watson.  “What do you think you’re doing, Lieutenant?” the other cutter’s captain asked. 

Jessie replied calmly, “Sorry I couldn’t inform you sooner, Bart."  Rob was surprised to hear his usually formal captain, use Watson's captain's first name.  I’ve got a plan to save our bacon and the Cousteau too.  Stay with us and keep your aft shields up.”

Rob expected him to protest, but Blake answered with curt agreement.  The two ships turned and retreated, with the cruiser in pursuit.  With no ships to worry it, the Cousteau easily handled the drones and destroyed the shuttle. 

“I want hit-and-run raids ready with whatever marines both ships have left.  We’ll be targeting their warp engines,” Jessie explained.  “Once we’ve done as much as we can with that tactic, I want Watson to launch a scatterpack.  We’ll follow it in then we’ll get behind the Cousteau and lock tractor beams onto it.  Our plan is to push it beyond the orbital distance of the third planet.

“I don’t have enough drones remaining for a second scatterpack,” Blake protested, “and I fail to see the advantage of this plan.”

“Use anti-drones if you have to.  We just need to give their phasers something to shoot at.  We’re going to get hurt badly enough as it is,” Jessie replied.  “As for the other idea, I’ll have to explain it later.  Trust me that it will work.”

Rob watched Blake think it over.  In the end, he agreed no doubt for the same reason Rob would have: he didn’t have any better idea of his own.  “We’ve only enough troops for one attempt on the engines.  We might as well make a combination of the two tactics,” he said.

Jessie agreed.  Before they reached the third planet’s orbit, the two cutters turned back into the cruiser.  The shuttle from Watson was launched as they began their turn.  By the time the ships were facing the Cousteau, the drones were deployed.  Holmes launched its own missile and five drones headed toward the cruiser.  The gremlins had learned the destructive power of drones and used three of their ship’s heavy phasers to make certain they were destroyed. 

That left one phaser and the photon torpedo to fire at Holmes.  The weapons smashed the weak forward shield of the cutter.  Rob held on tightly as the ship was badly shaken by the impact.  He noted Doctor Law sacrificing her own body to cushion the captain.  Damage reports began flowing in from all departments.  He didn’t bother to pass them on.   They all realized Holmes had been hurt, the question was how badly.  The cutter continued to perform its mission, though.  A moment later, he received word that a raiding team had been able to sabotage a conduit box in Cousteau’s engineering compartments.  Along with the efforts from a similar team from Watson, the strike had resulted in a ten percent decrease in the output of the cruiser’s warp engines. 

Watson turned sharply once past the Cousteau and attached a tractor beam to the cruiser’s main hull. Holmes, damaged and having reduced capabilities, was forced to make a more leisurely turn and let her sister ship carry out the stratagem.  Using the Starfleet cruiser’s own engines to help push it past the third planet’s orbit was the only chance the two tiny ships had of success and it worked perfectly.

Holmes was still within firing arcs of the Cousteau’s phasers as the cruiser’s weapons recharged.  With her shields destroyed and internal damage already heavy, Rob was sure the impending strike would cripple his ship.  When no strike came, he looked askance at his captain. 

Cousteau is, is continuing to maintain its present course and speed.  Shield reinforcement has been dropped and the photon torpedo in her tube is no longer being armed,” crewman Carawan reported.

“Send teams over to secure Cousteau’s engine room and bridge,” Jessie ordered. 

“You’ll find the creatures all dead," she explained. "I don’t know what the reason is, but you recall they didn’t want to go far from the second planet.  There must be something about the planet that kept these creatures alive when they were near it.”

“You were in sickbay when the creature died, captain,” Rob said.  “I don’t understand how you knew.”

“One of the marines in sickbay, trooper Marsden, was telling someone about it,” Jessie clarified.  “Sedated doesn’t mean dead you know.”  Rob wasn't the only one on the bridge that laughed. 

“Speaking of which,” Doctor Law said, “now that the ship has been saved you should be back in bed.”  Rob Cole had to grin as his c.o. gave him a helpless luck.
« Last Edit: August 26, 2005, 09:41:36 am by Andromeda »
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Andromeda

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #37 on: August 29, 2005, 12:39:58 pm »
sniff. *wipes tear* I really wanted feedback on this part since I wasn't sure if the solution came across okay.  I mean it works okay for me, but what do you think?
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #38 on: August 30, 2005, 04:19:43 pm »
I'll read and comment tomorrow morning or so.

I would now, but I haven't slept since 8:00pm yesterday and I really, really want some sleep.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #39 on: August 31, 2005, 09:37:45 am »
Hey Andromeda,

Interesting ending, for sure. You set up your solution earlier, but I don't think it wise to just assume it'd happen for all of the aliens on the GSC. That one alien could have just died of a heart attack, shock or something. Admittedly, no one had a better plan so this was the way to go, but as I've learned from my own experiences with 'If Wishes...' it might have been better to have it feel like more of a gamble, with some tense moments as we wait for the cruiser to fire--then suddenly it looses power. Something like that. :-)

Anyway, I was puzzled by this phrase:

Quote
Using the Starfleet cruiser’s own engines to help push it past the third planet’s orbit was the only chance the two tiny ships had

I know a fair bit about SFB, but I confess I don't understand this. Care to explain?

Other than that, a good, creditable ending to the tale, more so than beating up the cruiser would have been. Will there be an Epilogue/Final Chapter to explain why and how the cruiser got captured by aliens who cannot leave the orbit of their own planet?
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #40 on: August 31, 2005, 11:31:17 am »
Okay, it's time for La'ra's patented 'Big-Ass Review'TM

First of all, I have to say that I enjoyed this story much more on completing a reread from start to finish.  It was all right in parts, but it's pretty short and taken as a whole shot instead of several sips, it has a better impact.  That usually means the whole thing is very cohesive and tight, which is a good thing.

It's an enjoyable tale.  The plot is very basic:  This problem needs solving, these people have to try and solve it with these resources, this is how they do it.  I like that, especially when there's no apology for it, and there wasn't here.  While 'universe-building' and other such has it's place, a nice, simple story done well is probably the purest form of entertainment.

Upsides:  The battles between the Cousteau and the police cutters were obviously very well-planned (author-wise) and the results believable.  There was a tenseness in the combat scenes that I liked, something that said, yes, these little guys are contending with a clumsy, dumb giant, but he's still a giant. 

Your characters are believable, though given the action-oriented nature of the story, we didn't get to spend as much time with them as I would've liked....not that we should've since to try and cram in extra CD would have hurt the pace which is one of the strongest points of the story.  I got the basic idea about Decker and Cole and Lick without many direct statements about their character and personality (loved the bit about the Doctor shielding Decker from a fall with her own body).  That's a good thing:  Give us the information, let us form the picture.  The only exception to this is Jessie's early reminiscing about her Uncle.  It seemed a little too 'tell not show', but like I said, it's the exception.

Other things I liked were the constant references to just how small the cutter is.  Even big ships don't convey the palatial comforts often seen on TNG, and these little guys are likely to be cram-packed full of required equipment and crew areas with scant attention to habitability beyond basic needs.

Downsides:  The battle scenes are very strong, but the ships seem a little...sedate, to me.  I know they're in space and there's inertial dampners and stuff, but it never felt to me like the ships were moving.  The Holmes shook plenty when she was hit, but as close to the edge as she was being pushed, I think there should've been more obvious internal stresses...flickering lights, fluctuating gravity, people grabbing onto the bridge rail during sharp turns, etc.

A related issue stems from one of the story's strengths:  The battle is a little too SFB for my taste.  I never really envision starship captains manually allocating their power and ship crews noting the range using SFB range units.  I'd have made these processes a little more abstract.  There's also the issue of three-dimensional motion:  Forgetting that these ships move with complete freedom from gravity is something a lot of fan fic writers regularly do.  I have to deliberately remind myself to include the 'ups and downs' of things, but I find that my fight scenes are rewarded for it, seeming more like they're actually in space.

I'd agree with Andy about the end, but I'd like to see these people exploring why it was so catastrophic to the aliens to be removed from their planetary orbit.

Little nitpicks (or stuff that isn't required but would please La'ra's Klingon heart):  Despite your conveying the size of the Holmes well, I still think we need more atmospherics as far as being on the ship.  How's the lighting?  How's she smell? Etc.  A little more description of characters and scenes would be fun too.  Yeah, we all know the Command officer is in a gold mini-skirt and that the bridge lights blink a lot but reminding us of that occasionally can aid visuallization.

Stuff that doesn't fit anywhere else:  This feels more like the start of a longer story than a self-contained story itself.  That's not a downside or an upside, it just is, and I strongly hope you've planning on giving us some more of this particular crew.  I like them.

Overall:  I like it.  I'd like more stories with this ship and crew, or more stories from you in general.
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Andromeda

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #41 on: August 31, 2005, 12:17:10 pm »
Thanks guys that really helps.  Just the stuff I want to know for when I rewrite it - after the conclusion's been out for a week or so.

Scottish Andy:
About using the cruiser's engines to push it over the 'boundary': It was going forward when they tractored it and they added their forward thrust to its to make it go further forward than it wanted to before it could turn.  I'll make it more tense and easier to understand in the rewrite. 

There is a part four that will be coming out on Friday.  It's the wrapup to the story.  I wanted it all as a tight little episode one might find in TOS.  I'll work on taking SFB out of it if I can but that's the Starship combat I know.  And yes the captain should be less specific in power use.  I'll try and drop the SFB-specific terminology if I can.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #42 on: August 31, 2005, 01:35:59 pm »
Quote
I'll work on taking SFB out of it if I can but that's the Starship combat I know.

My thoughts on this:  Don't try too hard. ;D  Best thing about using SFB is that it'll give you a framework around which to base your combat scenes.  Soooo many Trek fanfics don't have any such thing, and it usually shows.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #43 on: August 31, 2005, 09:10:53 pm »
I enjoyed greatly!

I too have hang-ups on the SFB nature of the battles, but mine are different.
I liked that during the first battle, there was a definent sense of 'might not make it out alive'. I didn't get that so much from the last ship battle, but perhaps it was because I read it in instalments. I also mentally refer to your comments on another thread which aluded to your penchant for allowing the good guys to win, which takes much of the inherant 'stress' of possibly seeing our heroes die away from the tale. Many a Ttek show have I watched, knowing that Enterprise/Voyager/Defiant was going to make it just fine because I knew it was Trek. The only time they stunned me on this was in the 7th season of DS9 when they blew up Defiant... That actually had me cackling!

The idea of telling of the marine battle via the comm was a great way of saving time, but still emplacing that edge of combat. I liked that alot. However, what kind of cannon are we really talking about with your ph4s? Damn!

Thanks for an great tale, and I second La'ra, give us more!

--thu guv'!
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #44 on: September 02, 2005, 07:14:22 am »
I took La'ra's advice and re-read the whole thing in the one go. It certainly flows better that way, and I enjoyed your little tale.

The ending was good, and like Andy said, more believable than having some heroic combat action and a "mad crazy plan that just might work!" I liked your characters, and although there wasn't much development here (as La'ra said, it'd have ruined the pace of the whole story), we did get to see them as people rather than plot devices.
To me, it does seem like this is the centre section of a larger story, as this is how I come up with my stories. An action plot for the whole story that acts as the core, then plan a whole bunch of CD around it.

Just some stylistic comments now:
1) The ship names. You kept forgetting to put them all in italics, even using underlining instead.
2) When changing to a different scene/perspective, you should mark it somehow. Might I suggest using a double line of empty space, or some kind of page break? The main example for what I mean is the scene with Rob on the bridge wondering if they'll survive Blake's attack run plan, then going to Lick in the sickbay wanting to wake the captain.
3) When hearing someone speak from a out-of-room source, I like to put them in italics to, just to make that point clear. Examples are: hearing someone over the intercom from a different room on the ship, an on-screen transmission from an off-ship source, and someone's actual thoughts (as opposed to their thought processes)

Anyway, that's just my thoughts for your penny. Take them for what they're worth. :-)

I'd like to see more of this bunch. Keep them coming.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #45 on: September 02, 2005, 11:09:45 am »
I wanted to post the last bit before i had to leave, but I ran out of time.  It'll have to wait a couple of weeks.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #46 on: September 02, 2005, 06:46:16 pm »
Yeah, scene breaks would have been nice. Didn't think about that earlier...

I still love the pace of the whole story. It kept moving nicely. And it is better when read as a single entry. Hope we don't have to wait too long for more. :D

--thu guv'!
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #47 on: December 27, 2005, 02:39:06 am »
I am editing this now - including the ending.  I will post it for the new year.
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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #48 on: December 28, 2005, 12:08:49 pm »
Hey Rommie! You've finally got your life in order in Oz, have you? Well, welcome back, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you.

Looking forward to more from you.

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Re: Gremlins
« Reply #49 on: January 30, 2006, 11:03:35 pm »
I am editing this now - including the ending.  I will post it for the new year.

Nice - hope to see your last bit soon!


Po~
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Gremlins Final A
« Reply #50 on: February 09, 2006, 01:05:34 pm »
Here's the final version.  I hope you guys enjoy it.  I do have more in mind for these people, but that will have to wait until after the wedding.

*** *** ***

Special Weapons Troops outnumbered regular crewmen in the lounge of the USS Holmes.  The Holmes, along with her sister ships Watson and Adler, was a Federation Police Corvette on convoy escort.  Each of the three small ships carried four extra boarding parties to defend their herd of freighters from the raiding tactics of the Orion Pirates. 

The lounge was a den of noise, aromas and conversation that would never have found its way into such a public space on board a Starfleet ship no matter how small.  In the center of the maelstrom, at the proverbial eye of the storm, the ship’s commanding officer, Lieutenant Jessie Decker, and the captain of the Special Weapons Squads that were normally stationed on the Holmes, Chief Petty Officer Dave Lick, were playing 3-D chess.  Several black chessmen stood neatly on the table by the SW Commander and a smaller group of white ones were scattered about Lieutenant Decker’s side of the table.  Jessie rubbed a white knight in her fingers while considering her next move.  “Your problem, Jess,” offered the Chief unhelpfully, as she reached for a pawn, “is that you consider all your moves and make the most complicated one whether it’s sound or not.”

Lieutenant Decker hesitated, pulled her hand away, and began to consider anew.  The Chief sighed, squeezed the dark hair of his bangs, and rocked backward in his seat.

The door slid open and both players glanced up from their game.  The lanky form of Sensor Technician Jake Carawan all but stumbled into the lounge.  He ended up leaning against a storage locker with his arms crossed nonchalantly over his chest.  His eyes scanned the room and quickly came to rest on the two senior officers.  “Guess what Jess?” he blurted out as he walked.  “Sector HQ wants to talk to you.  It’s the Dragon Lady herself.”

Rising, Lieutenant Decker asked “Why didn’t you use the intercom?”  She looked back at the chief and shrugged an apology and headed for the bridge, Carawan trailing her. 

“It’s down for maintenance.  Lieutenant Cole sent me to get you ASAP, so here I am.”  The Holmes, a refitted corvette, was one of the largest ships in the list of Police Assets.  As such she wasn’t equal to one of Starfleet’s frigates in combat.  Her small size did give the Holmes at least one advantage.  The two members of her crew made their way from the amidships lounge to the bridge in under a minute without having to enter the turbolift system. 

Robert Cole, the Holmes’ executive officer, had already risen from the command seat and was standing beside it when Lieutenant Decker entered the bridge.  “Captain on deck,” he called out and then told her, “Our status is normal.  Admiral Brice-O’Hara is on channel two.”  For her ears only he added, “I’ll speak to Mr. Friedlin about not running maintenance routines during the first watch.”

Jessie nodded and quickly occupied the seat.  It still held the uncomfortable warmth of its previous occupant.  She made a brief scan of her tactical displays and then signaled for the channel to Headquarters to be opened. 

Admiral Sally Brice-O’Hara, commander of Sector Five of the Federation Police Force, quickly filled the main viewscreen.  Brice-O’Hara was examining a padd and Jessie found herself distracted by the holographic painting of the Draconian Gardens by Carin Sedjak, a famous artist from Jessie’s native Alpha Centauri, which was between the flags of the Federation and the Police directorate.  Jessie had a copy of the painting in her quarters.  She suspected that she was looking at the original.

The admiral finished what she had been doing and looked up at the viewscreen.  “Lieutenant Decker,” she said, skipping the usual pleasantries, “Starfleet has a situation on its hands that requires immediate attention.  Your squadron is the only force of starships in the area.  They asked for our assistance and you will be providing it.  I will transfer you to Admiral Pekoske of Starfleet momentarily.

“Understand lieutenant, that this is an opportunity for the Police Directorate.  See that we make a favorable impression.”  She looked down at the padd, obviously finished. 

“Admiral,” Jessie asked, feeling it her duty.  Although there was little danger of pirate activity in this remote sector, the possibility still existed and she felt the freighters were her responsibility.  “We are currently escorting a convoy to Narimar III.  What about them?” 

For the first time Jessie could ever remember, Admiral Brice-O’Hara smiled.  “I’m glad you asked lieutenant.  The Adler will remain with the convoy while Holmes and Watson are assigned to Starfleet.  Should your mission preclude your returning to the convoy, Starfleet will send a squadron of F4s from Narimar III to join it.  Any further questions?”

Jessie gave the painting one last look and replied, “No ma’am.”  There was a moment of static and a younger man with a severe expression filled the screen.  “This is Lieutenant Jessie Decker, commanding officer of the Holmes.”

The man responded with a frown.  “Admiral Pekoske, Starfleet Command.  Are you familiar with the Galactic Survey Cruiser?” he asked doubtfully.

Jessie nodded.  “Similar to a heavy cruiser in size, the GSC is designed for seeking new resources for the Federation.  It trades armament for sensors and other special equipment.”

Jessie was surprised to see the Admiral’s frown deepen.  “Are you any relation to Matt Decker?”

“He was my uncle, sir,” Jessie answered stiffly.  It was a painful subject to her, both because of his death and the effect it had on her career.  She had joined the Police Directorate instead of Starfleet to escape the illustrious family legacy.

It came as no surprise to her that the Admiral’s expression brightened.  “My condolences, Lieutenant.”  Jessie nodded faintly and the Admiral resumed his briefing.  “The USS Cousteau, a GSC, failed to make a regular check-in while exploring a previously undiscovered planet.  Your ship and,” he glanced downward, “the Watson are to investigate what happened and render any assistance necessary.  We are sending you the coordinates, information on the Cousteau and PA84-3301, the system she was investigating.  Report immediately on locating the Cousteau and as soon as you learn anything.  Good Luck, Lieutenant.”

Her executive officer, Lieutenant Cole, had moved across the bridge and was standing by the communications console looking over the shoulder of the operator.  “We are receiving the information from Starfleet Command.  I’ll have it transferred to the conference room as soon as we have it cleared.”  Jessie smiled; that room, normally empty, was also being used to accommodate their extra crew.

Later that day, officers from both Police Corvettes met to discuss the mission orders.  As quickly as possible, the conference room was restored for the use of the crew.  Twenty extra troopers was a slight, albeit welcome, imposition when expecting to face pirate raiders.  When the mission involved use of the Corvette’s other facilities, the space became rather tight. 

The officer’s mess was a cramped space that barely accommodated the Holmes’ six commissioned officers.  Under the circumstances, it was a welcome escape.  For the four days of their journey, it had provided a sanctuary against the increasingly boisterous crew.  “It’s a good thing we’re supposed to reach PA84-3301 tomorrow,” Jessie observed.  “Otherwise I think half of our combat team would be in the brig.”

Chief Lick, also responsible for ship’s security as well as the combat team, replied “It wouldn’t hold them all anyway.  There’s no need to worry, though.  I put up a sign this morning that anyone caught brawling would be assigned scullery duty.”

In the tiny space, the laughter of six people echoed loudly.  “Any guesses on what we’ll face?”  Jessie asked as calm was quickly restored.

Ensign Thomasina Acton, who served both as helmswoman and navigator for the Holmes, offered, “I’ve been looking at similar incidents.  It’s likely they’ve got a problem with their comm. system and will need some parts.”

“All the same,” countered the weapons officer, Ensign Etheridge, the newest addition to the ship, “I’d like to come in with the phaser capacitors charged and shields up just in case.”

“Good idea, Kevin,” Jessie answered.  “A little caution can go a long way.  A GSC is quite large compared to our little ships.  Have any of you ever seen one?”  None of them had.  “Beautiful ships.  Uncle Matt served on one before he got the Constellation. We got a tour when I was a kid.  Everything was bright and shiny.  It must have been a scientist’s dream to serve on one.  He always said that was where the real action was.” 

Jessie was surprised to find herself thinking of her uncle.  It had always been a subject she had avoided.  He had died a hero’s death, destroying a doomsday weapon.  It reminded her of the dangers of uncharted space.  She much preferred the well-traveled space lanes where the perils were known and were usually no worse than navigational hazards.  Even the Orions were a known quantity.

She suddenly realized that the conversation at the table had stopped and everyone was looking at her.  “I’m sorry, I was distracted,” she said.  “What did I miss?”

“We were discussing crewman Carawan’s idea on configuring the shuttle as a scanning platform to give us some kind of EW ability,” replied Lieutenant Cole.  “We don’t really have the power to do much otherwise.”

“We also don’t have another shuttle in case we need it for something else,” snorted Chief Lick.  “So we wondered which side you were on in all this.”

“Neutral,” Jessie said with a laugh.  “I think it would depend too much on the situation.  Why don’t you guys run a few drills to see how long it takes to pull the spare out of storage?”  She was rewarded with a few groans.

“You’re really looking forward to this, aren’t you?” he said and shook his head.  “Well, I don’t know about the rest of you, but I think it’s time for me to be going before somebody gives me extra work beyond what I’ve got already.”  He rose quickly and departed.  The rest soon followed suit.

The next day, the two ships entered the PA84-3301 system.  Holmes led the way, so it was Jake Carawan from her sensor station who first reported contact.  “Captain, sensors detect a warp trail around the second planet.  Our data on the system reports it as class M.”

“Adjust course for the second planet,” Jessie ordered, “and inform Watson.” The two police ships headed into the system.  A few moments passed and Carawan was able to provide a clearer picture. 

“The Cousteau is in orbit around the second planet.  Her warp output is fluctuating and unstable.  She probably can’t make warp.  There is no sign of any damage to the ship’s hull.”

“She does not respond to hails,” XO Coles added.

“Bring us in behind her,” Jessie ordered.  “We’ll send a shuttle over to find out what’s going on over there.  Keep up on the hails.  She may not be able to answer, but hopefully she can hear us.  Let them know what we plan to do.”

With Holmes still slightly ahead, the two corvettes approached the orbiting cruiser.  “Captain!” Ensign Etheridge suddenly called out.  “The Cousteau is locking phasers and preparing to fire.”

Jessie barely had time to order, “Reserve power to forward shields.  Emergency deceleration,” before the powerful beams of energy struck the Holmes full on.  Too late, Jessie grabbed the arms of her chair for support.
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Gremlins Final B
« Reply #51 on: February 09, 2006, 01:07:58 pm »
Jessie’s ears were ringing and she found she was clutching her armrest with a death grip.  She could hear Rob Cole speaking but she couldn’t quite make out the words.  She pushed herself upright and winced from a sudden pain in her chest.  “Repeat that,” she commanded through gritted teeth.

He turned to face her and she could make out what he said as much through reading his lips as hearing.  “Watson is moving to cover us; they’re going to distract the Cousteau’s fire.  Our shields held but there are minor injuries throughout the ship.”

She faced the viewscreen in time to watch as Watson moved across Cousteau’s bow and the Survey Cruiser fired its phasers at the police corvette.  “Get us out of firing range,” she said, careful to take only shallow breaths to avoid the pain.  “Tell Watson to follow.”   The police ships easily moved around the larger cruiser, which began to follow them away from the planet.  When the two corvettes were outside of the orbit of the third planet, the cruiser returned to its original position in orbit around the second planet.

Two minutes later, there was an impromptu strategy conference on the bridge of the Holmes with the staff of the Watson attending via the main viewscreen.   “Did you notice, Captain Decker,” asked her opposite number, “when we went across her bow, the Cousteau only attacked us with her phasers?”  Jessie nodded.  “Also,” he continued, “that their attacks on our two ships were not very tactically coordinated?”

 Lieutenant Coles summed it up for both crews.  “Whoever is in control of that ship isn’t familiar with its capabilities yet and probably doesn’t have control of its photon torpedoes.  It’s the same with the warp signature.  They can use the warp engines but not efficiently enough to leave the system under warp power.”

Thanks to her sore r