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Taldrenites => Dynaverse II Experiences => Topic started by: KAT J'inn on September 20, 2004, 07:10:55 pm

Title: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT J'inn on September 20, 2004, 07:10:55 pm
I kept a journal.   I was going to post it but I just don't see how it's possible.   Too many issues.  So some low lights.


DO NOT READ IF EASILY OFFENDED!!!

You have been warned.


What not to do in Vegas . . .


1)  Never hit on a girl on a plane.   Too dangerous.  It's too hard to tell what they look like from the waist down.   I got a phone number and a free ride to my hotel.  When we got off the plane I realized her hips were a least a meter wide.   YIKES!!   During the drive I also learned she was nuts.  RUN AWAY RUN AWAY.

2) Biker chick are fun but a little scary.  One reffered to me as her "virgin bitch."   Something about me never being on a Harley before  and the fact that she was driving me around on the back of the beast.   Man did my arse hurt.

3)  Never  NEVER NEVER NEVER let a cabbie take you to a strip club of his choosing.   Just trust me here.  When I left the cabbie taking me <snickered> and said "I bet a cabbie brought you here"   grumble.

4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

5)  Never play blackjack next to a desperate drunk divorced older woman.  Trust me.   I bearly survived.

6)  If the Message Service Ad says "Non Sexual"   THEY ARE FRIKKIN LIARS!!!    (I'd love to tell this one but I don't think I should) Also, be careful of the two for one deal.  You will be out numbered.

7) NEVER DRINK 12 RED BULLS IN ONE DAY.  Oye.

8)  WHen getting an "Off Strip" hotel.  Make sure it is in walking distance of the strip and WITHOUT a ()*&#(*&#)(*&# highway in the way.   GRRRRRRRRRR

9)  Always get a rental car.  No matter what the weasel at the hotel sez.

10)  Don't get pissed off at the poor cab service and get a limo out of anger.  Your drunk.  Your stupid.  And you will be broke.

11)  Don't be an idiot and not ask the beauitiful Jamican girl you met in the hotel out to dinner because you think there will be something better at the clubs.  I'm an ass.

12) After drinking a lot of Red Bull it is unwise to start drinking Red Bull based drinks at a night club.   My hands still shake.

13)  Biker Chicks can drink more than you.  Trust me here.


I feel sick.





Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Green on September 20, 2004, 07:43:56 pm
I kept a journal. 

Oooooo ... that is almost as bad as allowing photographs.  I thought we taught you better?

Quote
3)  Never  NEVER NEVER NEVER let a cabbie take you to a strip club of his choosing.   Just trust me here.  When I left the cabbie taking me <snickered> and said "I bet a cabbie brought you here"   grumble.

So I guess you never learned the lesson about not taking advice from gay cabbies?

Quote
4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

Let me guess?  Palamino allows drinks ... hmmm ... you must have really have gone off strip ...

Quote
6)  If the Message Service Ad says "Non Sexual"   THEY ARE FRIKKIN LIARS!!!    (I'd love to tell this one but I don't think I should) Also, be careful of the two for one deal.  You will be out numbered.

lol ... heard the story  (sts J'inn ;) )

Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: IAF Lyrkiller on September 20, 2004, 11:25:10 pm
Jinn, i have been to Las Vegas. the only problem i dont remember any of it... ;D

This ocured some 30 years ago... :o
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: SkyFlyer on September 21, 2004, 02:44:34 am
Jamacian girl eh? Bad J'inn. You didnt even give her my number.
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT MRess on September 22, 2004, 08:31:00 am
Been to Vegas several times...

 ::) Where to start, where to start...

I kept a journal.

As a lawyer you should know better. Anything you write will be copied, uprooted and replanted in Washington square and used against you.

Quote
DO NOT READ IF EASILY OFFENDED!!!

You have been warned.


Too late


Quote
1)  Never hit on a girl on a plane.   Too dangerous.  It's too hard to tell what they look like from the waist down.   I got a phone number and a free ride to my hotel.  When we got off the plane I realized her hips were a least a meter wide.   YIKES!!   During the drive I also learned she was nuts.  RUN AWAY RUN AWAY.

Well duh!. Remember alcohol hits you harder at higher altitudes. The more you drink they better they look.

Quote
2) Biker chick are fun but a little scary.  One reffered to me as her "virgin bitch."   Something about me never being on a Harley before  and the fact that she was driving me around on the back of the beast.   Man did my arse hurt.

Don't sit on the fender, use the back seat.  And NEVER date someone that could benchpress you.

Quote
3)  Never  NEVER NEVER NEVER let a cabbie take you to a strip club of his choosing.   Just trust me here.  When I left the cabbie taking me <snickered> and said "I bet a cabbie brought you here"   grumble.

Next time just take out your wallet and say "Just rob me now!"

Quote
4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

How do you think they keep their licences?

Quote
5)  Never play blackjack next to a desperate drunk divorced older woman.  Trust me.   I bearly survived.

This doesn't apply to just Vegas. BTW: which table was that...

Quote
6)  If the Message Service Ad says "Non Sexual"   THEY ARE FRIKKIN LIARS!!!    (I'd love to tell this one but I don't think I should) Also, be careful of the two for one deal.  You will be out numbered.

And this is a bad thing?

Quote
7) NEVER DRINK 12 RED BULLS IN ONE DAY.  Oye.

See # 5. One more word on this topic: Aspirin

Quote
8)  WHen getting an "Off Strip" hotel.  Make sure it is in walking distance of the strip and WITHOUT a ()*&#(*&#)(*&# highway in the way.   GRRRRRRRRRR

When making any sort of travel arrangements one must be aware of the certain advertising techniques. Allow me to translate:

Off-strip hotel = Located on the other side of the city, but we can't tell you that for fear of not getting your business.

Quote
9)  Always get a rental car.  No matter what the weasel at the hotel sez.

Remember, the weasel at the hotel (The concierge) will ALWAYS try to get you to spend more money. If you must take a taxi, DO NOT ask him anything,  TELL him where you want to go...  and no shortcuts! (they're even worse)

Quote
10)  Don't get pissed off at the poor cab service and get a limo out of anger.  Your drunk.  Your stupid.  And you will be broke.

Smack! It's a limo! What did you expect?

Quote
11)  Don't be an idiot and not ask the beauitiful Jamican girl you met in the hotel out to dinner because you think there will be something better at the clubs.  I'm an ass.

There is a reason she is in the hotel and not in the clubs. And it's either REALLY good (and expensive) or REALLY bad.

Quote
12) After drinking a lot of Red Bull it is unwise to start drinking Red Bull based drinks at a night club.   My hands still shake.

Lack of Blood in your alcohol?

Quote
13)  Biker Chicks can drink more than you.  Trust me here.

Of course they can! That's why they're biker chicks!



Well I hope you at least learned a few things. One more peice of advise when visiting Vegas...

Watch out for Female impersonators!
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Lepton on September 22, 2004, 11:38:48 am
One thing to say.  DEBAUCHERY!!!!
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Commander Maxillius on September 22, 2004, 02:29:01 pm
One thing to say.  DEBAUCHERY!!!!

 :woot:
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT J'inn on September 22, 2004, 02:57:33 pm

Quote
4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

Let me guess?  Palamino allows drinks ... hmmm ... you must have really have gone off strip ...



This is why I can't publish the entire log.  I'll get banned for life.  But . . . .


On this issue I asked for an explaination from the owner (demanded) of the "club".    It seems that within Vegas proper if there is full nudity they cannot server booze.   If it's just breasts in the wind, then booze is okay.   Palomino, it seems, is in a town called "North" Las Vegas and thus different rules apply.

Apparently, Las Vegas does have some standards.   Didn't seem to apply to the massage people though.  OYE!

Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Commander Maxillius on September 22, 2004, 03:22:46 pm
OMG!!! You're serious?!?!?!


must... go.... to Vegas......


and which massage parlor was that again? ;D
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT J'inn on September 22, 2004, 03:26:18 pm
OMG!!! You're serious?!?!?!


What?  You thought I was joking!??   LOL

I never joke about important stuff.  Money, debauchery, money.

Personally, I can't say that I like Vegas.  It's very plastic.  In so many ways. Gotta viist it at least once in life though.

I like South Beach much more.  But that's just a subjective opinion.

Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Commander Maxillius on September 22, 2004, 03:33:56 pm
hey, contact's contact.

Where's South Beach?  "South" covers a lot of places, and although specifying "Beach" narrows it down a bit, there's still a lot of guesses.


My first is Miami, am I right?
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT J'inn on September 22, 2004, 03:38:45 pm
hey, contact's contact.

Where's South Beach?  "South" covers a lot of places, and although specifying "Beach" narrows it down a bit, there's still a lot of guesses.


My first is Miami, am I right?

So young.  So naive.   So full of hope and promise.  <sniff>  I'm all verklimpt here.

Miami is correct.
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Kroma BaSyl on September 22, 2004, 03:45:02 pm


I like South Beach much more.  But that's just a subjective opinion.



Ooooooo! Kroma had no idea your door swung that way.
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Hexx on September 22, 2004, 03:51:00 pm
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: likkerpig on September 22, 2004, 03:55:32 pm
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

So true!
How can one make witty comments and the manditory wolf howls without liquid courage?
Strange folks south of our socialist paradise....
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT J'inn on September 22, 2004, 04:46:12 pm
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

Good point,  but here it's human females that are naked.  It's a subtile difference.


<snicker>

 
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT J'inn on September 22, 2004, 04:47:34 pm


I like South Beach much more.  But that's just a subjective opinion.



Ooooooo! Kroma had no idea your door swung that way.

<sputter>

<cough>



Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT MRess on September 22, 2004, 05:21:17 pm
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

I know of a place where:

the girls are totally naked,
they always serve no matter the state of dress (or undress) of the dancers,
the legal age is only 19, AND
the lovely ladies will even sit on your lap under these conditions.




Wanna know where it is?

 
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Hexx on September 22, 2004, 05:33:39 pm
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

I know of a place where:

the girls are totally naked,
they always serve no matter the state of dress (or undress) of the dancers,
the legal age is only 19, AND
the lovely ladies will even sit on your lap under these conditions.




Wanna know where it is?

 

Well pretty much anywhere in Canada I'm thinking..
(except of course Halifax... seems the port city doesn't have any clubs?)
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: likkerpig on September 22, 2004, 06:29:21 pm
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

I know of a place where:

the girls are totally naked,
they always serve no matter the state of dress (or undress) of the dancers,
the legal age is only 19, AND
the lovely ladies will even sit on your lap under these conditions.




Wanna know where it is?

 

Can't be Alberta, legal age is 18 here...
wonder if that is why I moved out here at that age...
memory is foggy, long time (and many dead brain cells) ago...
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Hexx on September 22, 2004, 07:39:06 pm
Tru actually, legal age in Ontario and Quebec is 18 , probably 18 here in NS as well
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Strafer on September 22, 2004, 08:30:00 pm
Last I heard it was 19 in Ontario, that's why the kids cross the bridge to Hull/Gatineau on the weekends...
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Wraith 413 on September 22, 2004, 09:09:23 pm
 Yes, Vegas is kinda strange in the way the law is administered there.  Been there, done that and thank God no pictures!!!!!


                                                                      Wraith 413

                           
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Soreyes on September 23, 2004, 09:33:25 pm
Dear Overlord J'inn

Ah where to begin. My flight to Vegas landed about 30 min after your flight left. (Damn weather delays)
You never did make it down to hook up with Toasty0 did you?........ Lets just say that between the hours of 10am and 6:00pm he kept my little ol drink glass always full...... and never charged me one cent ;D

And Where in the Hell were you staying? The Palms or the Orleans.... And please say you did not stay at the RIO.

As for Strip clubs? All you needed to do was go to "Olympic Gardens"...... I had a nice police officer give me a ride from there back to my Hotel :o ;)

Ahhhhh a week of Debauchery in Sin city :thumbsup: :notworthy: :notworthy:

Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Commander Maxillius on September 23, 2004, 10:43:03 pm
Dear Overlord J'inn

Ah where to begin. My flight to Vegas landed about 30 min after your flight left. (Damn weather delays)
You never did make it down to hook up with Toasty0 did you?........ Lets just say that between the hours of 10am and 6:00pm he kept my little ol drink glass always full...... and never charged me one cent ;D

And Where in the Hell were you staying? The Palms or the Orleans.... And please say you did not stay at the RIO.

As for Strip clubs? All you needed to do was go to "Olympic Gardens"...... I had a nice police officer give me a ride from there back to my Hotel :o ;)

Ahhhhh a week of Debauchery in Sin city :thumbsup: :notworthy: :notworthy:



TAXI!!

 :carmen:

Hey, ossifer...  cooii yooo <hic> <thud>


Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT J'inn on September 24, 2004, 08:40:39 am
Dear Overlord J'inn

Ah where to begin. My flight to Vegas landed about 30 min after your flight left. (Damn weather delays)
You never did make it down to hook up with Toasty0 did you?........ Lets just say that between the hours of 10am and 6:00pm he kept my little ol drink glass always full...... and never charged me one cent ;D

And Where in the Hell were you staying? The Palms or the Orleans.... And please say you did not stay at the RIO.

As for Strip clubs? All you needed to do was go to "Olympic Gardens"...... I had a nice police officer give me a ride from there back to my Hotel :o ;)

Ahhhhh a week of Debauchery in Sin city :thumbsup: :notworthy: :notworthy:



CRAP!!!  I forgot to go see Toasty!!  Arrrrghhhhhhhh

Due to the DeLaHoya fight all the casino were charging like $500.00 a night.  SCREW THAT!!  I stayed at a Marriott of the strip. ALthough a friend of mine did stay at the Rio.  They make the best Mohitos there!

I told the cabbie Olympic Gardens.  He said he knew a better place.   Yes, I'm THAT stupid.
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Soreyes on September 24, 2004, 12:32:03 pm
TAXI!!

 

Hey, ossifer...  cooii yooo <hic> <thud>


Ummmmmmm  I do believe thats what might have happend ;D  I think I also made a contrabution to the  Police Officer's "Rest And Recreation" Fund :o ;D

Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: KAT Chuut-Ritt on September 24, 2004, 02:51:53 pm


Ahhhhh a week of Debauchery in Sin city :thumbsup: :notworthy: :notworthy:

Actually Sin City is Nawlings Soreeyes, and when Chuut goes there it lives up to the name ;)

Full nudity and booze available on the street itself!
Title: Re: What not to do in Vegas
Post by: Father Ted on September 24, 2004, 06:10:49 pm
Having been there many, many times, and living there for a couple of years, this is a pretty good summation.

Regarding New Orleans, an excerpt from "Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need":

New Orleans is a wide open town, a town where there is gambling and heavy drinking and naked dancing and wild orgiastic sex. And that's just in the police station. The rest of the city is even looser, especially the French Quarter, which is so decadent that if the Reverend Jerry Fallwell were to merely walk down the length of Bourbon Street, he would emerge at the other end with an overpowering desire to purchase leather underwear.* New Orleans also boasts a number of historic sites, the major one being Nick G. Castrogiovanni's Big Train Bar, which is where, during the 1988 Republican convention, this author, for sound journalism reasons, drank a drink called "A Wild Night at the Capri Motel" out of a large styrofoam container shaped like a toilet.

*Assuming he doesn't have some already.