Dynaverse.net
Off Topic => Ten Forward => Topic started by: Clark Kent on October 01, 2004, 01:05:12 pm
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Some time ago I got to thinking- about God, and religion, or more specifically my religion: Christianity.
After much deliberation I came to some concllusions:
First, let's talk about the holy trinity; the father, son and the holy ghost, right? Each of them is it's one, but they are at the same time one and the same, correct? Sort of like your arm vs your head. If you reach for something your head doesn't do the reaching, the arm does, but since they both belong to the whole, the head can say that it reached out, given that the arm is a prat of it, and vice versa.
Now, of you'll allow me, I'm going to step of track for a moment and go to the Virgin Mary. How could she be a virgin? She couldn't. Sure maybe a man didn't do the deed, but the deed was still done, by God no less. Now, I'll grant you that God reportedly didn't do it in the conventional way, but the fact still remains that Mary was touch by the "hand" (read that euphamistically) of God in the naughty way. Now, on a side note, I can understand why Mary was supposedly the pristine creature for the rest of her life that we picture her to be. After all, once you been knocked up by God, how much better could it get? I mean, he's God, after all. how can you top that?
On another side note: I think that's why we assume God is a guy- he knocked up Mary, after all.
Now, back to the first topic: if the father, son and the holy ghost are all one in the same, like different parts of the same whole, then do you realize that Jesus (the son) did his own mother??? I mean, the bible says that the holy ghost knocked up TVM (The Virgin Mary), but since the son and the father are also the holy ghost because they are all one and the same, Jesus did his own mom. After all, one doesn't say that a woman was laid by the wing dang doodle, one says she was laid by the man. True the wing dang doodle had the stuff that did the laying, but it's still part of thewhole that did the dandy deed.
Do you realize what this means?
Jesus was the first Alabaman.
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Oh yes, and don't g=froget the obvious conclusion here: Jesus is his own dad.
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You know I never thought about it like that! Dang! Another argument I could have used in Sunday School! ;D
How about (and this is my favorite) if the humans are made in the image of God does God have a bellybotton too? But wait there's more! Did Adam and Eve have a bellybotton? Whoa here's another one and it's a dozy. Now there is a story that says that Eve is not the FIRST woman, and that Adam was attached to his first mate when God made them then later separated. Well now if that's how it really was and they were made in the image of God does that mean that God is a two bodied hermaphrodite?
Ok so am I gonna get slammed with Neg Karma now?
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Jeepers, Mr. Kent!
Biblically, theologically, Jesus IS God. He did say, "I and the Father are One." But your way of putting it is... well, rather rude, as in rubes, or uncultured.
Sex is not the no-no hush-hush taboo "Satan will slap you silly and throw you into Hell if you ask about the green bottle in the 'fridge" thing to God that it is to us... well, most of us.
Jesus is the incarnation of God on this Earth. To "make it so", God chose a virgin and while she was impregnated, sexually she remained virginal. See, it isn't the body or the Earth or such that is dirty; it's the spirit of Man. Sex in the proper context is a proper thing. A Savior, a Redeemer has to be spiritually and morally clean. None of us nor our ancestors nor our decendants would ever come remotely close to qualifying. He had to do it himself. So in that sense, in the corporeal, human, worldly sense, you're quite right, God had to come into this world as the Son to save it (from itself!).
But as he is preexistent, so even before this incalculably momentous historical event, that relationship existed among the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, before the Incarnation. Note that Jesus sent the Spirit among men after his ascension. They are one, yet three and are still all same, and all One. (Do I understand this? Not really.) These "names" or "descriptors" God revealed to us for each of his three persons are to point to us their different offices, though they are One and is God.
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Then you agree that Jesus was his own dad?
:brickwall:
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Change that to "is" and I'll start heading in that direction. It's more than "He's his own Dad", as they are distinct, yet One; they are one and the same. If you saw Jesus' smile (or glower... oh, I hope not), you saw the Father's.
You can come from behind that wall, now. I have lousy aim.
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As you wish:
Jesus is his own father!
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I'm God's tempworker, he hardly ever let's me hurl thunderbolts anymore :/
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:gg: :lol: