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Off Topic => Ten Forward => Topic started by: Clark Kent on June 21, 2005, 04:19:28 pm

Title: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 21, 2005, 04:19:28 pm
I think I'm losing my mental powers.  Over the last few days I've seen some attractive women and commanded them to strip using my mental powers, but they don't do it!!  they don't even show me their ta-ta's!!!
I feel so weak and useless.    :'(
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: IAF Lyrkiller on June 21, 2005, 04:40:49 pm
Cant help you there. ;D
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Jack Morris on June 21, 2005, 04:44:57 pm
Hot and spicy would have gotten you a reply from me there Clark!  ;)
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 21, 2005, 04:56:43 pm
True, but this forum seems so dea lately, I thought I'd (forgive the pun) spice it up a bit. ;D
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Jack Morris on June 21, 2005, 05:22:09 pm
I hear ya, it does seem like things in the world have gone dead for a while.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 21, 2005, 05:33:13 pm
Still, this does not answer my question:  Why can I not make attractive females unclothe at will?   ???
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 21, 2005, 06:07:16 pm
I put my powers through their normal run last night, no problems. I don't know whats wrong with yours man.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 21, 2005, 09:29:09 pm
Why don't you just rub it in dewd.   >:(
Perhaps it's the specimen you're using?  Send me a couple samples of what you're commanding, and we'll see where I get from there...
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: The Bar-Abbas Anomaly on June 21, 2005, 09:59:30 pm
Still, this does not answer my question:  Why can I not make attractive females unclothe at will?   ???



Male menopuase?


Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Sirgod on June 21, 2005, 10:04:39 pm
<Evil Snicker> Your in "L word" Brian.  ;)

Stephen
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 21, 2005, 10:51:53 pm
Still, this does not answer my question:  Why can I not make attractive females unclothe at will?   ???



Male menopuase?

Barrabbas...
Don't make me separate you... :carmen:
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: The_Joker on June 22, 2005, 01:23:38 am
You forgot the secret potion needed for the full effect, man.  They actually sell the stuff under the brand name of "Jose Quervo"....
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: AlienLXIX on June 22, 2005, 01:51:58 pm
Could be that some women aren't so easy?  ::) ;D
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 22, 2005, 04:26:18 pm
Could be that some women aren't so easy?  ::) ;D

Blasphener!!  all women are that easy!!!
Now take your pants off!!!   ;D
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 22, 2005, 06:12:45 pm
In all seriousness, this girl has been tough to get close to. She's quite busy, working 40+ a week and taking 3 summer courses.  It was just the right moment, really. It wasn't like, "Hi, who are you?"

My point?  Don't give up hope, keep working. The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 22, 2005, 07:53:33 pm
In all seriousness, this girl has been tough to get close to. She's quite busy, working 40+ a week and taking 3 summer courses.  It was just the right moment, really. It wasn't like, "Hi, who are you?"

My point?  Don't give up hope, keep working. The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Oh, when I get to know them well, it's just a matter of time.  No, I'm concerned because the ones on the street arren't dropping clothes for me when I command them to anymore. :'(
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: J. Carney on June 22, 2005, 07:59:02 pm
The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Ice, you have just proven yourself intelligent enough to be an enlisted man. You MUST quit OCS now and report immediately to your branch's basic training program. You must pass this wisdom on to other young men not so gifted with such knowledge, and you can't do that with a bar on your shoulder. ;)
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: GDA-S'Cipio on June 23, 2005, 03:21:43 pm
No, I'm concerned because the ones on the street arren't dropping clothes for me when I command them to anymore. :'(

Most likely, they've all seen your avatar.

-S'Cipio
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 23, 2005, 03:47:44 pm
The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Ice, you have just proven yourself intelligent enough to be an enlisted man. You MUST quit OCS now and report immediately to your branch's basic training program. You must pass this wisdom on to other young men not so gifted with such knowledge, and you can't do that with a bar on your shoulder. ;)

ROTC, close enough.

And if I ever become too distant from my NCO's and Airmen that I cannot pass on this type of valuable information, I want you to track me down and shoot me on sight.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: J. Carney on June 23, 2005, 06:29:42 pm
The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Ice, you have just proven yourself intelligent enough to be an enlisted man. You MUST quit OCS now and report immediately to your branch's basic training program. You must pass this wisdom on to other young men not so gifted with such knowledge, and you can't do that with a bar on your shoulder. ;)

ROTC, close enough.

And if I ever become too distant from my NCO's and Airmen that I cannot pass on this type of valuable information, I want you to track me down and shoot me on sight.

LOL... I'll take you up opn that one. :P ;D If you'll excuse me, I have to go clean my equipment...

we have a new LT, and she is cute (enough). I have to look good if I want to work on that Article 15 for Fraternization. ;D
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Sirgod on June 23, 2005, 07:34:34 pm
The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Ice, you have just proven yourself intelligent enough to be an enlisted man. You MUST quit OCS now and report immediately to your branch's basic training program. You must pass this wisdom on to other young men not so gifted with such knowledge, and you can't do that with a bar on your shoulder. ;)

ROTC, close enough.

And if I ever become too distant from my NCO's and Airmen that I cannot pass on this type of valuable information, I want you to track me down and shoot me on sight.

LOL... I'll take you up opn that one. :P ;D If you'll excuse me, I have to go clean my equipment...

we have a new LT, and she is cute (enough). I have to look good if I want to work on that Article 15 for Fraternization. ;D

You know, we need Pics. This is a Clark Kent Post of course.

Stephen
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: J. Carney on June 23, 2005, 08:41:18 pm
The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Ice, you have just proven yourself intelligent enough to be an enlisted man. You MUST quit OCS now and report immediately to your branch's basic training program. You must pass this wisdom on to other young men not so gifted with such knowledge, and you can't do that with a bar on your shoulder. ;)

ROTC, close enough.

And if I ever become too distant from my NCO's and Airmen that I cannot pass on this type of valuable information, I want you to track me down and shoot me on sight.

LOL... I'll take you up opn that one. :P ;D If you'll excuse me, I have to go clean my equipment...

we have a new LT, and she is cute (enough). I have to look good if I want to work on that Article 15 for Fraternization. ;D

You know, we need Pics. This is a Clark Kent Post of course.

Stephen

You want pics of me cleaning my equipment? :o
 ;) :P
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: AlienLXIX on June 23, 2005, 10:44:29 pm
The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Ice, you have just proven yourself intelligent enough to be an enlisted man. You MUST quit OCS now and report immediately to your branch's basic training program. You must pass this wisdom on to other young men not so gifted with such knowledge, and you can't do that with a bar on your shoulder. ;)

ROTC, close enough.

And if I ever become too distant from my NCO's and Airmen that I cannot pass on this type of valuable information, I want you to track me down and shoot me on sight.

LOL... I'll take you up opn that one. :P ;D If you'll excuse me, I have to go clean my equipment...

we have a new LT, and she is cute (enough). I have to look good if I want to work on that Article 15 for Fraternization. ;D

You know, we need Pics. This is a Clark Kent Post of course.

Stephen

You want pics of me cleaning my equipment? :o
 ;) :P

<Jumps up and down excitedly>  I DO! I DO!   OOOOO Clean IT goooooooooood! :-*

Oh and CK your powers are still not working.  Sorry, I've still got my clothes on. ;)
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Nemesis on June 23, 2005, 10:52:12 pm
Oh and CK your powers are still not working.  Sorry, I've still got my clothes on. ;)

Darn.

                  Wait a minute this explains why most of MY clothes are off.  KENT STOP DOING THAT!  I'm not your type of boy.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: TheJudge on June 23, 2005, 10:57:12 pm
The only ones worth chasing are the ones that take you on the wildest chase.

Ice, you have just proven yourself intelligent enough to be an enlisted man. You MUST quit OCS now and report immediately to your branch's basic training program. You must pass this wisdom on to other young men not so gifted with such knowledge, and you can't do that with a bar on your shoulder. ;)

ROTC, close enough.

And if I ever become too distant from my NCO's and Airmen that I cannot pass on this type of valuable information, I want you to track me down and shoot me on sight.

LOL... I'll take you up opn that one. :P ;D If you'll excuse me, I have to go clean my equipment...

we have a new LT, and she is cute (enough). I have to look good if I want to work on that Article 15 for Fraternization. ;D

You know, we need Pics. This is a Clark Kent Post of course.

Stephen

You want pics of me cleaning my equipment? :o
 ;) :P


Um, maybe.  Depends on the equipment.  25mm cannon, sure.  SAW, sure.  9mm or smaller, no way.  I don't like the small equipment.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 23, 2005, 10:58:28 pm
Oh and CK your powers are still not working.  Sorry, I've still got my clothes on. ;)

Darn.

                  Wait a minute this explains why most of MY clothes are off.  KENT STOP DOING THAT!  I'm not your type of boy.

That's not me dude, that's the judge.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: TheJudge on June 23, 2005, 10:59:26 pm
Don't let my future Husband hear you saying that...
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Nemesis on June 23, 2005, 11:00:23 pm
Oh and CK your powers are still not working.  Sorry, I've still got my clothes on. ;)

Darn.

                  Wait a minute this explains why most of MY clothes are off.  KENT STOP DOING THAT!  I'm not your type of boy.

That's not me dude, that's the judge.

I'm not his type of boy either. 
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 23, 2005, 11:02:25 pm
Don't let my future Husband hear you saying that...

I thought california still didn't allow gay marriage.  For that matter, last I talked to you, I thought you weren't even seeing someone.  You naughty big minx you.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: TheJudge on June 24, 2005, 01:18:46 am
I'm seeing a half-japanese, half-Irish guy I met about a month and a half ago.  If we don't have gay marriage here in california by the time we marry later this year, we'll go up to canada and tie the knot there before having a second 'religious' ceremony back here. 

I'm sure the priest we pick will have us do some type of relationship counseling before the ceremony.  :)
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Sirgod on June 24, 2005, 08:45:50 am
Don't let my future Husband hear you saying that...

I thought california still didn't allow gay marriage.  For that matter, last I talked to you, I thought you weren't even seeing someone.  You naughty big minx you.


Well after seeing that Pic, My mind works.

Stephen
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 24, 2005, 10:52:35 am
I'm seeing a half-japanese, half-Irish guy I met about a month and a half ago.  If we don't have gay marriage here in california by the time we marry later this year, we'll go up to canada and tie the knot there before having a second 'religious' ceremony back here. 

I'm sure the priest we pick will have us do some type of relationship counseling before the ceremony.  :)

Well dude, as you know I'm undecided about the whole gay marriage thing, not sure what to think of it.  That said, after a month and a half, don't you think it's a bit soon?  I'd hate to see you get hurt from taking the plunge so soon.  I do wish you the very best, though.  Just concerned.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 24, 2005, 11:12:42 am
Important note about the article 15 stuff

It's only fraternization if you're "dating" in some sense. So long as you're not a "couple" then you can marry her. God bless military intelligence, huh?
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: AlienLXIX on June 24, 2005, 03:16:32 pm
Important note about the article 15 stuff

It's only fraternization if you're "dating" in some sense. So long as you're not a "couple" then you can marry her. God bless military intelligence, huh?

LOL  that's right!  Makes my head hurt . . .  What the hel do they tell their commands?  "No no it was love at first sight for the both of us and we decided that getting married would be the best way to date!"   :o ::)

Judge, a half-japanese, half-Irish guy?  OOOOOOO sounds good got pics?  I knew a half-filipino half-irish set of siblings.  My gods they were striking kids.  All of them had warm brown skin, green eyes (the color of new leaves) and these beautiful locks of dark auburn hair.  *SIGH*  To bad the one that was my age was a stoner or I might have given him a go.  Know what I mean?  Nudge nudge wink wink!
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 24, 2005, 10:13:32 pm
Important note about the article 15 stuff

It's only fraternization if you're "dating" in some sense. So long as you're not a "couple" then you can marry her. God bless military intelligence, huh?

LOL  that's right!  Makes my head hurt . . .  What the hel do they tell their commands?  "No no it was love at first sight for the both of us and we decided that getting married would be the best way to date!"   :o ::)



Ya know, this is part of our orientation to the Air Force for ROTC in school, (I was a first year student). Our instructor, an AF Captain, mentioned this. I went to raise my hand and he just stops me and goes "I know. And no, it doesn't make sense."
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Mr_Tricorder on June 25, 2005, 12:45:48 am
Lol.  I took basic Air Force ROTC classes at Texas A&M during my freshman and sophomore years (I just finished my senior year).  This definitely sounds like the Air Force (not dissing the military or anything, I'm just commenting that I've noticed that a lot of things don't make sense, especially in the Air Force.)
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Sarek on June 25, 2005, 01:47:44 am
 Half-japanese, half-Irish?  Doesn't sound like large equipment to me, both are know to carry a snub nose.  :D

Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: AlienLXIX on June 25, 2005, 03:11:20 am
*snicker*  Gee Sarek, seems like you've been "hanging" with the wrong guys! 
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Sarek on June 25, 2005, 08:30:06 am
Maybe CK's problem is he's hanging with the wrong girls; maybe his power isn't working because if it did he would have a "Crying Game" experience.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 25, 2005, 10:24:41 am
Lol.  I took basic Air Force ROTC classes at Texas A&M during my freshman and sophomore years (I just finished my senior year).  This definitely sounds like the Air Force (not dissing the military or anything, I'm just commenting that I've noticed that a lot of things don't make sense, especially in the Air Force.)

I think its a bit less specific than that. Actually, I know it is. My Dad just retired from the Army, its no better. I'm sure Alien will tell us the Navy is just as bad. As for the Marines, well, we know they're messed up from the get go!  :D
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Sirgod on June 25, 2005, 10:32:05 am
Lol.  I took basic Air Force ROTC classes at Texas A&M during my freshman and sophomore years (I just finished my senior year).  This definitely sounds like the Air Force (not dissing the military or anything, I'm just commenting that I've noticed that a lot of things don't make sense, especially in the Air Force.)

I think its a bit less specific than that. Actually, I know it is. My Dad just retired from the Army, its no better. I'm sure Alien will tell us the Navy is just as bad. As for the Marines, well, we know they're messed up from the get go!  :D

Hey now, I resemble that Remark.  ;D

Stephen
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 25, 2005, 11:04:07 am
Maybe CK's problem is he's hanging with the wrong girls; maybe his power isn't working because if it did he would have a "Crying Game" experience.


They only cry when I say good bye.
Hey sarek, you Irish?
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Mr_Tricorder on June 25, 2005, 11:47:31 am
Lol.  I took basic Air Force ROTC classes at Texas A&M during my freshman and sophomore years (I just finished my senior year).  This definitely sounds like the Air Force (not dissing the military or anything, I'm just commenting that I've noticed that a lot of things don't make sense, especially in the Air Force.)


I think its a bit less specific than that. Actually, I know it is. My Dad just retired from the Army, its no better. I'm sure Alien will tell us the Navy is just as bad. As for the Marines, well, we know they're messed up from the get go!  :D

Yeah, I know it's less specific than that.  Here at Texas A&M we have ROTC for all branches of the military.  I just latched on to the Air Force comment because I chose to take Air Force ROTC here (in retrospect, I should've taken Army ROTC.  They have a lot more fun.  All you do in Air Force ROTC is sit in a classroom and listen to a Major or Lt. Colonel talk to you about leadership.)  I'm a member of the Corps of Cadets at Texas A&M, which requires it's members to take basic ROTC during their freshman and sophomore years.  After that, cadets can decide if they want to get a contract through advanced ROTC courses, or be content with civilian life.  If you have no idea what the Corps of Cadets is, you can go here www.aggiecorps.org (http://www.aggiecorps.org).  I'm also a member of the Aggie Band www.aggieband.org (http://www.aggieband.org)
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 25, 2005, 01:41:03 pm
Yeah I have a basic idea what a Cadet Corps idea is. And yes, the Army has a whole lot more "fun" if by "fun" you mean playing in the mud for a weekend or two. Thats why I joined the AF, the hell with that!
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: AlienLXIX on June 28, 2005, 03:51:24 am
Truthfull I really think the UCMJ needs a totaly overhaul.  There are so many rules and such that either contradict themselves or make no sense that it's a danger to moral when going to your JAG for help.  But that's my .02!

Yes the Navy rules can be just as FUBAR as the rest of the military.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 28, 2005, 10:39:15 am
Truthfull I really think the UCMJ needs a totaly overhaul.  There are so many rules and such that either contradict themselves or make no sense that it's a danger to moral when going to your JAG for help.  But that's my .02!

Yes the Navy rules can be just as FUBAR as the rest of the military.

I have to agree. You know, for the longest time, the AF banned backpacks while in uniform? Kinda made ROTC difficult...


Anyways, back on the topic at hand, WOMEN and the disrobing thereof.
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 28, 2005, 10:52:12 am
Truthfull I really think the UCMJ needs a totaly overhaul.  There are so many rules and such that either contradict themselves or make no sense that it's a danger to moral when going to your JAG for help.  But that's my .02!

Yes the Navy rules can be just as FUBAR as the rest of the military.

I have to agree. You know, for the longest time, the AF banned backpacks while in uniform? Kinda made ROTC difficult...


Anyways, back on the topic at hand, WOMEN and the disrobing thereof.

The army is the same way- they like to disallow just about everything and use regs to justify it. Case in point: umbrellas.  Soldiers can't use them in rain.  Why?  Back in the cav days they spooked the horses.  The cav days are still long gone, but that is the only reasonthey gave us when they told us no umbrellas durring a heavy downpoor one day "it spooks the horses."
Rules made for a reason, kept by fools, and enforced by imbeciles.

Now, as to the disrobing of women: they do it far too little.  We should make a new law or something...
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Iceman on June 28, 2005, 12:25:26 pm
Air Force just now is getting around to letting us use umbrellas of black of dark blue persuasion.  And if it took the pretty boy Air Force this long to do it, the Army/Navy/MC have a LONGGG way to go.


I don't know about a law, perhaps clothing free zones? Sorta like free speech zones?
Title: Re: Oh dear God, please help me on this
Post by: Clark Kent on June 28, 2005, 12:39:50 pm
Air Force just now is getting around to letting us use umbrellas of black of dark blue persuasion.  And if it took the pretty boy Air Force this long to do it, the Army/Navy/MC have a LONGGG way to go.


I don't know about a law, perhaps clothing free zones? Sorta like free speech zones?

Too Passive.  Not good enough
I need naked women and bewbies.  NOW.