Topic: Call-In  (Read 9203 times)

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Offline Scottish Andy

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #20 on: February 19, 2008, 04:04:01 pm »
Zhen you 'ave con-fus-ed moi.
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Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #21 on: February 19, 2008, 04:10:42 pm »
When I wrote the scene initially, it was present tense like the rest of the story, and went on longer.  I was trying, with the way it is now, that Mystery was sort of quickly reviewing her encounter with the old man and was now emerging from the building.

Or something.
"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #22 on: March 25, 2008, 01:43:43 am »
Now that life seems to be settling back down to cruising speed...

-----------------

A quick call on her cell phone has the police looking for the Colonel's vehicles.  It isn't an official search.  Some cops are cooperative when it comes to superheroes.  Mystery knows a couple like that.

She doesn't mention the reasons.  She doesn't mention the Colonel, though she does stress that she thinks the beat cops should stay away from whoevers in the vehicles.  She makes pleasant conversation after her request, then hangs up.

Traffic ebbs and flows around her.  The superheroine can think of little else to do.  She has to wait now.  Or does she?  Surely there were other avenues to search down, other ways to find Wilhelmina and her merry band.  She removes her glasses at a stop light and rubs her eyes.  Her stomach growls.

She debates going to the police station.  She could search through call reports looking for suspicious behavior in vacant buildings.  She could 'feel the city' as she did around PC Shack.  She doesn't know where to start, but if she just kept looking...

The light turns green. Mystery replaces her glasses.  She has to stop, she knows.  It's time to stop, at least for today.  Food and rest are more important than Colonel Einhorn.  Food and rest will help her find Colonel Einhorn.

The superheroine turns toward home.


*  *  *


Mystery's dreams are distant and moody.  She tosses and turns, waking herself occasionally, only to settle back into disturbed sleep soon after.  Deep rest finally comes, but morning seems too close behind.

Morning, and a massive headache.

The superheroine stumbles into her bathroom.  She'd once expressed amazement that her friend with the hat took aspirin in threes.  He was much larger than her, and explained it was a necessity for him.  Mystery is the same size she always is, but she decides four of them won't kill her.

Unlike a hangover, sunlight isn't a bother.  Cold light from the winter sun is streaming through her living room windows, and she spends a few moments bathing in it.  Her headache starts to ebb, and she checks her messages.  Nothing, or nothing about Colonel Einhorn.  She knows better than to expect instant results, but she's still a bit disappointed.

Today is a Dee Jay day.  It's a Thursday.  She has a show tonight.  It should be an easy one.  No guests, just callers and music and conversation.  Normally she enjoys her job;  today she dreads it.  It's the same thing she always does, but while she's entertaining Paragon's radio lovers, she can't be searching the streets.

She probably shouldn't be searching the streets, she reminds herself.  She'd overtaxed herself in Galaxy City, and had almost talked herself into doing more of the same at the end of the day.  That was the reason for the headache.  That was the reason she'd be dull throughout the morning.  Sun-blind to emotions she normally sensed easily.  Besides, her leads might bear fruit soon.  The show would take her mind off the waiting.

She bathes and dresses.  The flight box goes around her waist.  Radio day or not, anything could happen.



*  *  *


“Andy from King’s Row, you’re on the air.”

Hello, Mystery!”  Happy voice, accent from some part of the British Isles.  “I’m a big fan.

“That’s always great to hear.  Have something you want to talk about tonight?"

That’s why I called.

“Well that’s why I’m listening.  Lay it on me.”

I’m really concerned about…

Mystery tunes out her caller.  She’s listening, but not to his words.  He’s talking politics.  Really he wants to vent.  His mood shifts and changes as he verbalizes his worries.  It improves.  She lets him talk for a bit, lets out a quiet sigh.

One of the phone lines is reserved tonight.  Open line from her police friend.  Any lead on the Colonel, it’ll ring.  She has an emergency play list programmed in case she has to leave, a cheater tape of some unaired calls. 

Normally she considers her shows to be inviolable.  She helps people with them, in small ways.  She enjoys them.  She isn’t hung up on normal, but it’s nice to have a part of her life that doesn’t involve gunfire and other hoo-hah.

…this country would be less divided if…

The Dee Jay is having trouble keeping her mind on her caller.  Irritation grows.  The Colonel is worming her way into too many private satisfactions.  She forces her attention back towards the here and now.  Yes, her caller just needed to vent.  He’d been going on for quite a while, though.  She waits for a moment of pause to interrupt.

“Things always move in this direction before they swing back the other way.”  She advises.  It’s a stock answer, applicable to many things but no less true.  “It’s like a tide, and we’ve survived plenty of them.”

I suppose that’s true…”   The caller agrees.  He’s reassured, though she didn’t really do it.  He’d just needed to speak his peace.

She says goodbye, moves on to the next person.  She hopes whoever it is isn’t into politics.

Babe!”  An enthusiastic voice.

“Hello, Razor.”  She smiles.  She has a brief happy moment of relative normalcy.  “What’s shaking tonight?”

Just wanted to let you know I fixed things at the club!  Guy knows to let you in even if the place is full.  Just don’t tell the fire department!

Mystery laughs.  She’s a local celebrity.  Fact of life is that no club’s going to deny her entry.  She doesn’t care.  Razor was making sure that if she wanted in to see his band of metal-blaring miscreants, she would have no problems.  It was a small, sweet gesture.

“I’ll do my best to be there.”  She says.       

You rock!”  Razor declares.

“This is true.  That was Razor, lead singer of the band Bonesplatter, performing tomorrow night at Amp.  Free advertising courtesy of Mystery Lynn!  Who do we have next, Murray?”

The caller info on her little screen seems innocuous.  The Dee Jay’s stomach twists.  She knows who it is.  She hits the ‘accept’ button anyway.

“Mina from Atlas Park, you’re on the air.”

Hello, Mystery.  How’re you doing tonight?”  Accent is Southern.  Georgia or South Carolina.  The Colonel is tricky with her voice.

“Doing just fine, thanks.  How’re you?”  The Dee-Jay’s teeth are clenched.  She barely manages to make the words sound friendly.

Quite well, actually.  I’m in town for a couple of days, and I’ve already found out an…old flame is trying to look me up.

“I see.  And is this a problem?

Well I’m not sure.  She showed up at the place I was staying and was pretty adamant about getting in.”  Laughter in the voice.  Laughter in the mood.  The Dee-Jay’s fist’s clench.  “I don’t mind assertiveness, but I’m not sure I know how to handle someone so aggressive.

“So she wasn’t like this before, huh?”

Oh she was up front about things, certainly.  But I’m a delicate woman.  Too much and I can get intimidated.

Mystery’s teeth grind.

“Thought about meeting up with her?  She sounds like she really wants to see you.  Maybe meet her someplace alone.”

I don’t know.  Like I said, I’m only in town a couple of days.  Not sure what she’s after is something I want.

“Well, ya’ know, it sounds like she may not be giving you much of a choice.”  The Dee-Jay fights the urge to snatch up the phone, scream angrily at the Colonel.  She’s on the air, and the damned woman would just hang up.

You might be right.  I suppose if I don’t wanna see her I should make sure she doesn’t find me.  At least until my business is concluded.  Then I might have time for some fun.

“I wouldn’t rely on that.  Never know when you might bump into her.”

True, true…but hell, the last time this happened, it was me just bumping into her.  Who knows where something like that might lead?

“Might not lead to the same place.”

Wherever it goes might be just as much fun.”  A pause.  “And I suppose that’s really how I should be looking at it, yes?  Now that I’ve talked about it, I almost can’t wait for her to come and get me.

“Hope ya’ don’t have to wait long.”  Mystery snaps, hangs up.  “Think it’s time for a commercial, everyone.” 

Her producer stabs a button.  He’s giving her the same slightly-freaked out look he was two nights ago.  He’s curious and worried.  Mystery has her face buried in her hands.  Her heart pounds, her face is flushed.  She’s quite angry.

There’s the sound of a ringing phone.  She’s waiting for her producer to answer when she realizes it’s the reserved line.  She snatches up the receiver.

The cop has good news.  She’s out of her chair before he’s finished talking.  The producer protests, but sets up the cheater tape.  Her coat is on and she’s out the door.

« Last Edit: March 25, 2008, 08:43:43 pm by Commander La'ra »
"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Governor Ronjar

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #23 on: March 25, 2008, 08:46:45 pm »
This was a nice piece about Mystery's...'day job'...

Good nuances and leads me to want to see some combat. Bring on the ass whooping!

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Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #24 on: April 01, 2008, 04:34:20 am »
Windshield wipers bat away snow.  Mystery isn’t driving fast.  She can’t;  giant snowflakes are pouring from the sky, and all the cars around her move at a cautious crawl.  The super heroine’s fingers drum on her steering wheel as she turns onto an exit.

On the radio, her voice is counseling a caller.  Cheating girlfriend, or so he’d thought.  Boring.  The producer had saved it since it was the kind of thing people liked to listen too, put it on the tape.  She wishes he’d play music.

She’s on Talos Island again.  The world is an odd amber outside her car window as streetlamps reflect off new snow.  Tall buildings shield the streets a bit, and the asphalt is wet but not yet slippery.  She heads for the north shore of the island.  Independence Port is the main harbor in Paragon City but ships dock along the TI waterfront too.  She’s looking for an old storage area near the marina.  A patrol car had sighted the van there.  Lights had been burning where they shouldn’t have been.

Mystery parks in a small lot overlooking the bay.  City lights reflect off black water.  She can see the storage facility.  It’d once been used to house pleasure craft during the winter.  The police weren’t quite sure who owned it now.  It was probably supposed to be empty.

It was another good choice of hideout, Mystery decides.  Nebulous ownership, uncertain status, but not completely abandoned.  Room for several people in what used to be the office/repair shop. 

As she watches, a man emerges from the repair shop.  She cannot tell if he’s armed; too far away.  He lights a cigarette, smokes it with a certain haste.  The super heroine stretches her senses.  She feels impatience, need, discomfort balanced by bliss as the nicotine hits the man’s senses.  His heart is mostly greed and discipline; uncomfortable as he is, he glances toward his buddies on guard duty.

Mystery smiles;  the man discards his cigarette and walks back inside.  She can’t see the guards, but knowing they’re there helps.  She feels them, distantly for she cannot see them and has no emotional connection.  One watching the gate, the fence facing the street.  One, sure enough, watching the bay.  Both have a confidence Mystery associates with carrying a weapon.

She can’t see either of them.  That’s to be expected of Colonel Einhorn’s men. 

She stuffs her hands in her coat pockets.  She can’t tell for certain that they are the Colonel’s men.  They aren’t part of her cadre, her core of real followers.  There’s a lack of something, the odd loyalty Wilhelmina inspires.  The Colonel, however, isn’t above hiring outside help.  These fellows do feel like hired help.

The flight box hums.  Mystery takes to the air.  She stays at a decent altitude for about a third of the trip across the bay.  The snow would conceal her.  The shop looms larger, and she drops so low she’s skimming the wave tops.  She shivers deeply, hair going damp from salt spray.  She can still feel the guard.  She’s sure he’s looked at her, but not seen.  Just in case, she encourages his urge to search high.

Her feet hit the ground next to a concrete boat ramp.  Her clothes are sodden.  She tries to ignore it, runs and ducks behind some tarp-covered equipment.  The guard hears something, turns to look.

She almost makes him feel safe, almost makes him ignore what was probably a cat or something.  She doesn’t.  He’ll be a threat as long as he’s around to do his job.  Boots crunch on snow, drawing closer to the super heroine. 

The guard comes ‘round the equipment.  He’s about to turn and look at her.  She moves a little faster, slipping behind him.  He senses her body heat, her presence, but doesn’t turn.  She’s making the sensations feel very good on this cold night.  He gasps.  She whispers in his ear.  He collapses.

He’s not a small man.  He hit’s the ground, already snoring lightly.  His gun clatters on concrete. There’s a spike of not-quite-alarm from across the little boatyard.

Mystery closes her eyes.  She feels suspicion.  She sends out calm.  Lazy calm.

Slow footsteps, getting louder.  She can’t see the other guard.  The snow is heavy now.  She grabs her sleeping victim by the wrists, pulls him, with a little telekinetic assistance, behind the pile of equipment.  The footsteps are much closer.  Just enough time to grab the sleeping man’s gun, hide it too. 

She never thinks of using it.

A shadow is moving behind her hiding spot.  Suspicion is growing despite the artificial calm.  The conscious guard is looking for his friend.  He can’t find him.  Worry.  Metal on metal as a round is chambered.

The super heroine peeks out of her sanctuary.  The guard has his gun in a low ready.  His worry is peaking.  He’s about to call for help.

You don’t need help.  She can’t touch him, but when she speaks, he feels…caressed.  Warm.  As if all is well.

He freezes, as his friend had.  Utter surprise at sudden pleasure.

How many inside? 

He’s disciplined.  He’s never been shown ways to defend his own mind, but he’s a gifted amateur.  He can’t answer, shouldn’t answer, won’t answer.  He’s aware of his gun and his radio.  He doesn’t get past that…Mystery puts some force behind another suggestion.  The guard joins his friend in slumber.

Both men are wearing radios.  They’ll be expected to check in soon.  Every few minutes.  She doesn’t run for the lit-up building.  That’d be foolish.  She stays low, ducking behind this and that, keeping low, moving at a fast walk.  She can hear noises from the old workshop.  A television or a radio.  Talking.

The front door is out.  Probably too many people, too many guns, in the front room.  Can’t take that chance.  There are windows.  She half-jogs over to one, catching a glimpse of her reflection: soggy clothes, wet, dripping hair, intent expression.

She peeks in the window.  No lights in there.  There’s probably an alarm on it.  If there hadn’t been before, the Colonel would’ve installed one.  She’s probably on camera right now, but if anyone’s noticed her, she can’t feel them.  She picks up a piece of urban refuse, hurls it through the window.

Sure enough, there’s an alarm.  Surprised voices inside the old workshop.  Guns being primed.  Mystery flattens herself against the side of the building, peeks into the broken window.  She can hear the front door opening, excited radio calls.  She has seconds.  What if they don’t do what she expects?

One person does.  A man, weapon at the ready, flows into the broken window room.  He has a split second, a tiny chance to notice her before she acts.  Luck isn’t with him today.  A hard mental shove sends him flying back, into a wall.  He has a partner, right behind him, who gets a dose of the same.  The groggy men are blinking, reaching for weapons.  Mystery’s already inside.

They’re already afraid.  She makes it worse.  Makes them feel small, inconsequential.  Beneath her notice.  Certainly beneath being able to hurt her.  They stare at her in fearful worship.  She tells them to sleep.

They do.

There’s a not-so-distant cry. A warning.  Someone is yelling that ‘she’ is in the building already.  Mystery charges through the door.  There’s a woman in the main area, rising from a crude bank of monitors.  Her pistol is coming up. The super heroine throws herself to one side.  The pistol cracks three time.  A sound like angry hornets as the bullets zip by.

Mystery makes noise.  Not real noise.  A voiceless scream.  The pain is enough that her attacker drops her pistol, fingers seizing temples.  A telekinetic shove puts the gunwoman on the floor.

The superheroine ducks low, conscious of the people outside.  She flips a light switch.  In the dark she had the advantage;  her eyes aren’t as important as her more exotic sense.  The gunwoman is groaning, starting to rise.  She sees Mystery, scrambles for an unseen weapon.  Then she goes to sleep.

Mystery frowns.  Her attacker isn’t the woman she’s looking for.

Glass shatters.  Constant ‘zips’ as bullets rip by.  Something sharp tears into the superheroine’s bicep, and she cries out.  She drops, flattening herself against the floor.  Bits of plywood rain down on her as projectiles tear through the exterior wall.  Then there’s quiet, the distant sound of someone reloading a weapon.

Mystery opens her senses.  Determination and fear outside. Sudden resolve.  They’re about to try something.  Another barrage of lead tears in from outside.  At the front door, she feels a need to kill.

The door busts open, a guard with a machine gun charging through.  He’s a step inside when the door flies back in his face, hard.  He falls backwards, yelping in surprise.  Gunfire from outside ceases again.  Mystery pushes herself up, sprints for the door.  One man is reloading a weapon.  Another is on the ground bleeding from the nose.  Mystery ‘screams’ again.  They scream in a more traditional fashion.  Weapons are forgotten.  In a moment of multitasking, she tells them if they sleep, the pain will stop. 

Their cries cease, replaced by slumber.

The superheroine ducks back inside.  She listens for more people, more threats.  Nothing but dream-images from a bunch of sleeping thugs.  She takes a breath, gives her heart a moment to slow.  There’s a sudden awareness of pain.  She’s bleeding from the shoulder, pretty heavily.

Wincing, she removes a four-inch long piece of wood from her shoulder.  Shrapnel, not a bullet.  She concentrates on the wound  It begins to close.  It’s not an instant process, but it doesn’t take long.  She can’t fix her bloody sweater so easily.  That’ll wait.

She disarms her unconscious opponents, collects the guns in safe place.  She drags the men outside into warmer areas.  The police will be here soon, and she needs to ask questions, but she can’t leave people lying in the snow. 

Which one to ask?  She gazes at her collection of dozing mercenaries.

The woman, she decides.
"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Scottish Andy

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #25 on: April 07, 2008, 04:40:41 pm »
nice little segment. Really interesting development/expansion of her mental powers. One thing intrigues me here:

Quote
In a moment of multitasking, she tells them if they sleep, the pain will stop.

They choose slumber to escape the screaming in their heads? I guess having a willing target makes it easier to put them out, but could she do so anyway? Or is that a limitation on her powers? She "persuades" them they want to go to sleep, but if they aren't persuaded she can't force them?

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The Doctor: "Must be a spatio-temporal hyperlink."
Mickey: "Wot's that?"
The Doctor: "No idea. Just made it up. Didn't want to say 'Magic Door'."
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Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #26 on: April 08, 2008, 05:07:13 am »
Quote
They choose slumber to escape the screaming in their heads? I guess having a willing target makes it easier to put them out, but could she do so anyway? Or is that a limitation on her powers? She "persuades" them they want to go to sleep, but if they aren't persuaded she can't force them?

She can force them, if she has too, but that takes more effort, it's more draining, and they can resist her.  She instead offered them two choices...sleep or scream.
"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #27 on: April 16, 2008, 04:57:46 am »
One of the characters in this story irks me.  She just keeps torpedoing scenes planned long ago...

---------


Always a little surreal, peeking into a dreaming mind.  Thoughts were free, not restrained by language.  Some images, some feelings would lead to the places you’d expect, others, seemingly mundane, might trigger…defenses.  Every person had parts of themselves they didn’t wish to reveal.

Mystery wants information.  She doesn’t want to harm the woman.  She treads carefully.

Images of money, guns…the superheroine follows those.  They lead to memories.  Fleeing a bank while exchanging fire with the police.  Target practice in an old quarry.  They’re not fresh memories, they’re simply…prevalent. 

She lets the woman dream for a moment, waiting for something familiar.  Dream images of the fight…the inside of the boatshop.  Those might do.
Discomfort.  Cold.  Irritation.  Boatshop isn’t heated, and the portable the mercenaries had brought wasn’t enough.  Irritation at a certain person for taking the job.  Happiness at the thought of a payoff.

Payoff.  The Superheroine follows that one.

The woman’s thoughts become more coherent.  Aware, dimly, of the intrusion.  Mystery cannot simply stop, but she tries to be…quieter.

Images of a local warehouse.  Maps of the same building.  Something valuable inside.  No knowledge of what.  Stealing for pay, not to fence the stuff themselves.  The idea that it would be easy.  The fear that their employer wouldn’t pay up.

Employer…

There’s no loyalty to the employer.  There is a little fear.  Not a ‘normal’ client.  So-called super villain.  Unpredictable.  Colonel Einhorn.

Mystery’s fists clench.

There’s more about the employer.  The sleeping woman doesn’t trust the Colonel.  Doesn’t like her disappearing for hours.  Doesn’t like her insistence that they wait a couple days to do the job.  Doesn’t like her taste in radio.  Mystery hears her own voice in the sleeping woman’s head.

Nothing about where the Colonel is now.  Mysterys abandons stealth and simply ’asks’.

Resistance.  Greater awareness of a trespasser.  Knowledge of who the intruder is…not specifically, which was good…and determination to fend her off.

Mystery soothes, cajoles, reminds the woman that no one can hear this.  The mercenary remains defensive.  Mystery justs wants the Colonel.  Where is the Colonel?

The mercenary doesn’t know.  The employer had vanished again.

The next question is sensitive…Mystery asks why the Colonel was making those phone calls.

The sleeping woman is confused.  She doesn’t know about any phone calls.



*   *   *


The superheroine steps out of the boat shop.  Sirens are howling;  they’re getting closer.

Mystery jogs to the water’s edge, activates the flight box.  The snow is heavier now, sheets of it assaulting as she flies back across the bay.  She’s running, she realizes. 

It’s a silly thing to be doing:  She’s a licensed super heroine.  She’s just disabled a band of mercenaries working for a known criminal who were armed with illegal weapons and shacked up on someone else’s property.  She has no reason to fear the police.  Mystery doesn’t want questions, especially ones she cannot answer.

Boots hit asphalt. The flight box shuts down.  She turns, looks back across the water.  There are flashing blue lights all around the marina now.  For the first time tonight, cold invades her senses.  She’s soaked to the skin.  She shivers deeply and heads for her car.

The Prius starts.  The engine is still warm, and deeply appreciated heat comes spewing out of the vents.  She has some extra clothes in the passenger seat.  She changes into them, awkwardly.

Her teeth chatter. 

Disappointment creeps up on the super heroine.  It’s worse than the cold.  She’s rousted the Colonel’s hired help, perhaps stopped a robbery.  That hadn’t been what she’d came for.  Hadn’t been it at all.  She’d wanted answers, explanations.  Closure, perhaps.  What she’d wanted didn’t matter now.  The police would find out who the thugs were working for, and the whole city would be looking for Colonel Einhorn.  Insane as she might seem, the Colonel was a practical woman.  She’d be out of town and far away before morning.

There’s a black, sinking feeling in Mystery’s chest.
 
The Colonel would be back.  The Colonel wasn’t done with her.  The next time she had business in Paragon City, the pattern would repeat, and Wilhelmina would be armed with more knowledge of her, how she would react.  This could go on forever.  She leans back in the car seat, closes her eyes, and sighs.

Mystery is suddenly aware of a smell that doesn’t belong.  Oily, mechanical…she’s a half second from recognizing it when she feels the cool touch of metal on her temple.

Scared brown eyes find the rear view mirror.  There’s a gun to the superheroine’s head, black sunglasses, the sound of an unrestrained Afrikaans accent.

“Drive.”  Colonel Einhorn instructs.
"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Scottish Andy

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #28 on: April 17, 2008, 02:21:26 pm »
Not much to comment on here. A good continuation, more insight into how Mystery does things, but nothing really grabs me from the plot.

As for storytelling style, still batting... whatever a good batting score is.  ;D
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The Doctor: "Must be a spatio-temporal hyperlink."
Mickey: "Wot's that?"
The Doctor: "No idea. Just made it up. Didn't want to say 'Magic Door'."
- Doctor Who: The Woman in the Fireplace (S02E04)

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Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #29 on: May 15, 2008, 11:39:24 pm »
And...she's done.  Hope I carried the ending off well, though I'm more confident of that that I might've been since a usual 'surface reader' who betaed it caught the foreshadowing very early in the story.  Tell me what ya'll think.

------------------


The Prius is just using it’s electric engine.  The radio is off.  The only sounds are tires on wet road and breathing. 

The Colonel doesn’t look like herself.  She’s dressed conservative-casual.  Jeans, blazer, long fashionable trench coat.  Her hair, longer and curlier than usual, is blonde.  It was a far cry from the wild woman in lycra who’d knocked over First State Bank two months back.

The gun is more typically Colonel.  It’s small, sleek, high tech looking.  It’s pointing at Mystery and hasn’t wavered, though now it’s bearer is in the passenger seat.

“Turn here.”  Einhorn instructs.  Mystery complies.  The Prius pulls onto the highway, hums down the road.

“Why are you doing this?”  The super heroine asks.  The Colonel smiles, a small, yet threatening expression.  She doesn’t answer.

Mystery tightens her grip on the wheel.  She tries for the hundredth time to reach into the Colonel’s head.  The effort hurts.  There’s some kind of static in the air.  An unnatural mental noise.

A mile passes.  Then another.  The highway takes a wide turn.  There’s an exit ramp.

“Get off here.”  The Colonel orders.  Off to the left is Paragon Bay.  Mystery entertains a brief notion of running the car off into the water.  The divider would probably stop the little Toyota.

The exit leads to a park area on the mainland.  It’s not a safe place at night.  The Colonel doesn’t seem to care.  Mystery drives as instructed, down one forgotten car path after another.

Whatever Einhorn was doing to her mental senses, Mystery still has an option.  She’s all brute force with her telekinesis, but perhaps she could knock the Colonel out, disarm her….she knows better than to try in the car.  The gun was too close to miss, even if the shot fired was accidental.

Would the shot that killed her be accidental?  Mystery doubts it.

“Ah, here we are.”  Einhorn coos.  Was the joy in her voice honest?   The Prius slides to a halt.  There’s nowhere for it to go.  They’re at a dead end, a recreation area that hasn’t seen use in years.  “Get out.”

This is where it’d happen, Mystery decides.  Miles away from anywhere.  No one around to hear the shot or find the body.  She’d lay out here for days.

But why go to all the trouble?

“Why are you doing this?”  The super heroine asks.  Why the drama?  Why the harassment?  Hundreds of chances to kill her.  Was this all just theater?

“Get out.”  The Colonel says.

Mystery opens her door.  She has a better chance outside anyway.  She slips out of the car.  The Colonel is standing before she is.  The gun is still pointed at her.

“Down by the water?”  The Colonel asks.

“Sure.”  Mystery snaps.  “Why not?”

She marches downhill, leaving bootprints in the snow.  Talos Island is beautiful, thousands of lights burning.

Seashore, waves sliding onto rocky ground.

“This is stupid.”  Mystery snaps.  “Can we please just get this over with?”

“Turn around.”

Mystery has no complaints there.  She’s not a violent woman, but with a little anger flowing, she can understand why one would prefer not being shot in the back.  She turns to face the Colonel.

Einhorn has lost her blonde hair.  Straight, reddish brown and blunt cut, now.  The natural state of it. She still has those silly sunglasses.

Now or never.

The Colonel flies backwards.  The gun cracks and flashes, bullet whizzing off to nowhere.  Mystery charges.  The Colonel is rolling to her feet;  another mental shove and she’s down again.

Mystery throws herself onto her tormentor, hands seizing the villainess’ wrist.  She squeezes, fingers pushing hard into pressure points.  The Colonel shrieks, but doesn’t drop the gun.  Hard punches to Mystery’s ribcage.  The super heroine gasps for breath.  The gun slips a little.  A mental shove sends it sliding across snow.  Another sharp blow to the ribs. Mystery cries out, surrenders her hold, throws hard punches. 

She’s screaming as she strikes.  A fist to the nose, the cheek, the jaw.  Blood on her knuckles.  The Colonel reaches up, grabs hair.  Something hard slams into Mystery’s face.  Stars dance in front of her eyes, her hands fly to her mouth.

There’s a brief sensation of flight.  She’s in the snow again.  She rolls away, struggles to her feet.  The villainess is already up, already at her lost gun.  Mystery knocks her down again.  It takes too much effort.  Pain in her head.  The Colonel lands well, comes up with the gun.  The villainess has lost her sunglasses.  Scared brown eyes meet insane blue.

She runs at Mystery.

The heroine is a little too hurt, a little too slow to stop the charge.  Bodies collide, end up back on the ground.  Another painful mental shove gets the Colonel off her.  She tries a last, futile time to get in the Colonel’s head.  Still the static.  She can’t win.  Maybe she can escape.  Flight box is still there.

She comes up into a crouch.  Wilhelmina is doing the same.  The flight box hums.  A heavy boot slams into her stomach.  She rolls, farther and faster than if the box wasn’t on.  She skids to a halt a foot from the water, face down in powdery snow.  She’s trying to get up when a weight pins her, a hand seizes a handful of hair.  The gun is at her temple, again.

“You see, Mystery, the reason I called…”  The Colonel’s voice, the Colonel’s accent, right next to her ear.  “…there’s this woman.  I have her completely at my mercy, and was wondering what you think I should do with her.”

“Will you please just get this the f*ck over with!”  Mystery barks.  She can’t yell.  Doesn’t have enough left in her.

“But then the fun would be over!”  Wilhelmina cackles.

“Fun.“  Blood spatters snow with every word.  Mystery tastes it in her mouth, enough she has to swallow. “I’m some goddamn game to you…”

“No game, my little cape.”  There’s a quality to the Colonel’s voice, the sound of utter satisfaction.  “That doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy myself.  You enjoyed yourself the last time, didn’t you.”

Mystery trembles.  Hands crush snow.

“You were going to kill me!”

“You were the intruder, my little cape.  The invader.”

“I was there to arrest you!”

“And all by your little self, too.  So foolish.”  The Colonel’s voice drops to a whisper.  “Were you just that confident?  My cocksure little Dee Jay…”

Mystery trembles.  Anger and fear.  Embarrassment.

“Did you plan what happened?”  The villainess coos.  “Was that how you were going to…disable me?”

“You…were going to…hurt me.”

“So you crawl around in my head.  You find something I need and throw it at my feet so I won’t kill you?”

“That’s not what it’s like!”

“Then what was it like?”

“I didn’t think about what I did, I just…did it.  What was I supposed to do?”  Tears in Mystery’s eyes.  “Why are you doing this to me?!”

“You already know.”

“No I don’t!  You could’ve killed me that night if I….offended you that much!”  She takes a breath.  Blood’s in her nose now, too.  “Is this torture?  Do you just want me scared all the time?”

“You are scared of me, aren’t you?”  The Colonel purrs.

“You’ve got a gun to my head!”

“Lots of people have had a gun to your head.  What’s so different about me, hmmm?”

Wilhelmina pauses.  Mystery can feel the smile on The Colonel’s lips.

“Do you just like bad girls?”  The Colonel asks.  “No…I don’t think that’s it.  Too simple for you.”

“I like men.”  Mystery growls.

“That didn’t stop you before, now did it?  I’ll tell you what I think….I think you got a peek inside my skull…and you liked it.”

“But you’re f*cking crazy!”  The heroine yells.

“And you like it!”  Einhorn barks.  “Little cape, little miss help-people.  They call you with their problems, their little sicknesses and they just want you to fix them!  And you do!  So good at it, Mystery Lynn is.  So good at making them normal!”

“That’s what you wanted to do with me, isn’t it?  Crazy ‘Mina.  You wanted to fix me.  That’s why you came alone.  Therapy time!”

More insufferable satisfaction.  “You forgot that insanity can be… a choice, didn’t you?” You can’t fix me, little cape.”

“You’re such a goddamn psycho…”  Mystery murmurs.

“Uh-huh.”  A little laugh.  “And you know what?  You wants more of it. You want more of me. You want more of your Colonel, don’t you?”

Mystery manages not to scream.

“Not once did you bring some other cape.”  Einhorn snarls.  “Not once did you tell the police the nefarious Colonel Einhorn is in town.  You haven’t even tried to call for help now, have you?  All alone.  Mystery and ‘Mina.  That’s how you wanted it.”

“I didn’t want anyone to know.”  Mystery confesses.  Logical voice now.  She’s seized some control.  Has too, somehow.  “I didn’t want anyone to know what happened.”

“You didn’t want anyone to know you needed another taste.”  The Colonel whispers.  Teeth sink into Mystery’s ear.

More tears.  “That’s not what I want.”

Hot mouth on her earlobe, her neck.  The gun was gone.

“This isn’t…”  Her head is pulled back.  The kiss is hot and brutal.

“Oh God.”
"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #30 on: May 15, 2008, 11:49:44 pm »
Mystery awakens.  It’s a slow, languorous process involving a stretch.  She’s cold, but she can feel sunlight on her skin.  She becomes aware of discomfort, pain.  She’s not in a comfortable position, and whatever she’s laying on is scratchy.

Oh Goddamnit, Colonel!  She thinks.  It’s an irritated thought, rather than a malicious one.  She laughs a little.  Her eyes open.

She’s in the back of the Prius.  The cargo area, specifically, with the rear seats folded for more room.  There’s a blanket over her, and sunlight streaming through the rear window gives her surroundings a hazy quality.

She’s also naked.  She makes a noise that’s halfway a sigh, halfway a growl.  Clutching the blanket to her chest, she sits up, looks around.  Outside the car  the world is still snowy.  The tide has come in, and the shoreline is closer, calm morning waves sloshing against rock.  There’s no one around, thank God.

With some effort, she crawls into the driver’s seat.  She looks for the wet clothes she’d changed out of the night before.  They’re gone.  She curses the Colonel yet again, arranges the blanket around herself like a primitive dress.  The keys, thankfully, are in the ignition.

She starts the engine. The heater will take a few minutes to warm up, but it’s still relatively warm in the car;   Einhorn must have run it for a while, after she’d rendered Mystery unconscious.

Think of everything, don’t you, Colonel?  There’s no response.  There’s no noise at all, really, being so far out of the city.  It’s a rare, quiet morning for the Dee Jay.

Something on the passenger seat catches her eyes.  Scrap of cardboard.  Colored white -- or was it ‘bone’?  It’s someone’s business card.  Not the Colonel’s, but there’s a phone number on the back, scribbled with precision and with periods instead of dashes in the European style.

“You are so crazy.”  Mystery says to no one.  And, God help her, there’s a little twinge of excitement in her belly.  She doesn’t deny it, now.

She puts the car into gear and heads for home.



*   *   *


“That was Carol from Founder’s Falls, and it sounds like she’ll be single soon, fellas.” Mystery chuckles into the microphone.  “Line forms to the right and no shoving.”

“Oh Lord…”  The caller giggles.  There’s a little excited surge from Carol. Mystery enjoys it as she hangs up.

“Who do we have next, Marty?”  The Dee Jay asks.  The data comes up on her little screen.  “Was expecting this one.  How’re you doing Razor?  Really loved the show!”

“Saw you in the front row!”  Razor howls.  “Was worried you wouldn’t make it!”

“So was I.”  Mystery laughs lightly.  “And ya’ know what?  I’m wearing one of your T-shirts.”

“Awwww….you rock!”  Razor remarks.  Surge of something honest there.  Happiness that someone he likes is willing to wear his colors.

“Yes, yes I do.”  She looks down at the shirt.  She’d bought it out of fondness for Razor and the sudden need to replace a couple of tops.  “Nice…screaming skull?”

“Yeah!  Lulu came up with the design…she’s artistic like that!”

“I can certainly see that.  So how’d the show go over with, you know, the club people.”

“Invited us back in a month, babe!”

“Things are definitely looking up, then.”

“Yeah, babe, they are!  And in case I forgot to mention it, you f*ckin’ rock!”

The Dee Jay shakes her head, smiling.

“Thanks…babe.”  She replies.

“Awwwwwww yeah!”  Razor hollers before he hangs up.  Mystery laughs hard.

“That was Razor, and just for the record, he and his band Bonesplatter really do put on a great show.  That’s my pro bono advertising for the night.”  She looks up at her producer, he nods.  “Next caller is…”

She was expecting this one, too.  Her stomach twists, and she takes a moment to examine the sensation.  She wasn’t scared any more.  Nervous?  Maybe nervous.

“Mina from Atlas Park, you’re on the air.”

“Hello, Mystery.  I called in to the show the other night, do you remember?”

“Yes, yes I remember.”  The Dee Jay answers.  Her face is hot.

“I just wanted you to know you were right.  That woman did find me.”

“I told you.”  Mystery chides.  She had.  “How did things…turn out?”

“A little different than I expected, I’ll admit.”  The Colonel is doing her Southern accent again.  “She was…as aggressive as I’d feared.  We even had a bit of a disagreement.”

The Dee Jay stops herself from snorting.

“It was her fault, though.  She just assumed from the way I greeted her I was mad at her, or something.”

Mystery clenches a fist, twists her mouth into a little knot.  It wasn’t so much an angry expression as a perturbed one.

“In most relationships, assigning blame is a mistake.  Not everyone reads signals the same way.”  She opens her hands, relaxes.  “How did things go after your argument?”

“About like I’d expected.”  Her phrasing was innocuous.  Her tone was not.  Anyone listening knew ‘Mina’ had got some tail.  They didn’t know who’s, thank God.

Mystery kicks the floor a little, smiling despite the little bit of violence.

“About like she expected too, I think.”

“Always dangerous to assume what someone else expects or wants.”  Mystery chides, quieter for a moment.

“But wonderful when you’re right.”

“Maybe.”  The Dee Jay’s smile returns.  She had questions.  She was supposed to be the answer woman, though.  How to do this…

She says, finally, in her therapeutic tone. “Was this just a one night thing?”

“Oh…I don’t think so.”  The Colonel answers.  Her tone is…deliberately sexual. “She is….once is never enough.”

Nor, apparently, was twice.

“How does she feel about that?”

“Oh, she knows.”  ‘Mina answers smugly.  Mystery kicks the floor again.  “It may be difficult.  Our jobs cause…schedule conflict.”

“Well sometimes if circumstances won’t let something happen…”

“…then you make them happen.”  Einhorn interuppts.  “I’m certainly not going to give up.”

“What are you looking for, from this woman?”  Mystery asks.

“Anything I can get.  Like chocolate, as long as the taste is in my mouth I suspect I’ll be satisfied.”

The Dee Jay’s face burns.

“I guess that does leave your options open.”

“The worst part is that I have to leave town for a while.”  The Colonel confesses, a wry tone in her voice.  Mystery chuckles to herself.  Despite other events, she had foiled the villainess’ scheme.  One of them, anyway.  “I may not see her for a while.”

“You know what they say about absence.” 

“’They’ are full of sh*t.”

Mystery laughs.  She was laughing a lot tonight.

“Sometimes.”  She grants.

“But I’ll be back sooner or later and then we’ll see what happens.”

“No giving up, huh?”

“Never.  And like I said the other night, whatever happens is bound to be enjoyable.”

Mystery smiles a very personal smile.

“I guess it might be.”

I must go now, Mystery.  Thank you for taking my call.”

“Thanks you for calling in.“ She answers.  “Goodbye, ‘Mina.”

“For now.”  The Colonel says.  The line closes.  A dial tone.

For now.  Mystery thinks.

She spends a few moments in reflection, followed by a few in anticipation.  Nothing logical about what’d happened with the Colonel.  Was that why she wanted more?

Who knew?  She shakes her head, chuckles, and looks at the clock.

“Looks like that’s all the time we have for tonight, Paragon City.”  Mystery announces into the microphone.  “Until next time, this is Mystery Lynn, for Paragon City’s hoooot ninety-five nine.”



END
"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Governor Ronjar

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #31 on: May 19, 2008, 09:56:48 pm »
I love the story. I love most girl on girl stuff. And while I got nice mental imagery...this one still somehow left me feeling all icky inside. Like I'd just violated myself with a really knobby dildo...

Just about perfect, I'd say then.

Fire up another one.

--guv
'It's a lot of hard work being a mean bastard...' --Captain Eric Finlander, CO USS Bedford (The Bedford Incident)

'Jaken...are you pretending to be dead?' --Lord Sesshomaru, Inuyasha.

Offline Scottish Andy

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #32 on: May 30, 2008, 03:35:04 pm »
Okay, that was really hot, and the tweaking phone call was perfect. That was a pretty good wrap up, and I love that the story was all about Misty'n'Mina getting it on! All the crime stuff was just window dressing for a goody-two shoes getting her bit of rough.

The Guv's response though... scares me. Now I feel all icky inside!
Come visit me at:  www.Starbase23.net

The Senior Service rocks! Rule, Britannia!

The Doctor: "Must be a spatio-temporal hyperlink."
Mickey: "Wot's that?"
The Doctor: "No idea. Just made it up. Didn't want to say 'Magic Door'."
- Doctor Who: The Woman in the Fireplace (S02E04)

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Offline Governor Ronjar

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Re: Call-In
« Reply #33 on: June 07, 2008, 08:23:45 pm »


The Guv's response though... scares me. Now I feel all icky inside!

Good...GOOOOOOD!


--guv!
'It's a lot of hard work being a mean bastard...' --Captain Eric Finlander, CO USS Bedford (The Bedford Incident)

'Jaken...are you pretending to be dead?' --Lord Sesshomaru, Inuyasha.